Recent Locker Room Comments by taupe

Fucking Ronald Reagan keeps finding ways to piss me off. Even when he dies, he pushes an MLS game off the air.

posted by taupe at 04:34 PM on June 05, 2004

I liked the two-leagues-both-in-EPL idea, precisely because people in the lower league could easily end up with higher scores than people in the higher league, and could thus give them no end of shit for it. That's fun in and of itself, and creates a de facto single league parallel to the two divisions, and, I think, would make everybody happy.

posted by taupe at 01:22 PM on May 20, 2004

(Like it did right there when I didn't repaste. Those were ' 's, by the way.)

posted by taupe at 04:57 PM on May 17, 2004

(After further review, it's just too ugly to try to post the code, so I guess the link above will have to do. It's a filter, wherein you save the HTML of the premierleague.com table page to a file like 'w38o' or 'w38m', and then just run it through as input with 'perl epl.pl w38o.txt' to get table code. You'll probably also need this as a template to put the table code into to preview. Also, when you're done building the table, you have to [1] remove all line breaks within the table itself before copy-pasting it to post, or else your table will be flanked with acres of blank space, and [2] repaste the whole table in again after preview, because previewing will turn all the ' 's in your code to spaces, leading to bad results.)

posted by taupe at 04:51 PM on May 17, 2004

And here's the final table:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	38	51	2,486	1,891
2	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	57	72	2,882	1,883
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	26	49	5,624	1,842
4	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	48	55	8,890	1,810
5	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	33	62	11,274	1,791
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	35	13,483	1,775
7	Crap City United	g s p m	20	36	13,671	1,774
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	40	37	27,842	1,698
9	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	55	50	32,678	1,677
10	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	60	41	35,054	1,667
11	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	33	43	39,273	1,650
12	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	29	46	39,529	1,649
13	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	37	42	45,695	1,626
14	vagabonds	christopher f	20	44	50,293	1,609
15	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	21	43	50,589	1,608
16	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	28	38	62,545	1,566
17	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	34	46	63,702	1,562
18	last again	eckeric eckeric	9	42	67,428	1,549
19	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	33	48	79,943	1,507
20	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	40	84,148	1,492
21	Finally	Mark D	13	50	84,520	1,491
22	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	32	87,383	1,481
23	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	26	42	89,534	1,474
24	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	37	91,247	1,468
25	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	34	93,364	1,461
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	48	98,629	1,443
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	25	109,352	1,405
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	25	30	123,633	1,355
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	41	127,713	1,340
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	21	204,866	1,022
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	17	60	250,708	699
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	32	43	273,559	527

May
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	62	2,666	175
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	1	51	4,992	168
3	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	4	72	9,999	160
4	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	2	55	10,674	159
5	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	3	60	36,833	142
6	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	2	43	47,018	138
7	bluebears	andy griffiths	1	49	49,781	137
7	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	2	50	49,979	137
9	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	0	38	63,726	132
9	Finally	Mark D	0	50	63,726	132
11	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	0	46	71,147	130
12	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	0	37	75,076	129
13	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	42	110,970	121
13	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	48	110,970	121
13	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	2	43	115,600	121
16	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	37	121,182	119
17	Crap City United	g s p m	1	36	141,229	116
18	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	35	141,886	115
19	vagabonds	christopher f	0	44	147,143	114
19	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	3	46	152,197	114
21	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	1	42	157,158	113
22	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	4	41	173,519	110
23	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	1	30	193,947	106
24	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	1	43	198,919	105
25	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	40	199,372	104
26	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	32	227,675	98
26	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	2	48	231,738	98
28	tallclay	Clay H	0	41	255,237	91
29	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	25	261,958	89
30	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	42	270,818	86
31	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	34	276,067	84
32	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	21	306,437	48

I thank everyone for their kind words of appreciation throughout the season related to these updates. Mostly doing them was its own reward for me, just as a little hobby project and as a means of doing something others could find useful. I may do updates again next season; I'll definitely have a team. The break will do me well, though -- I'm burned out on all this for a while. I had a good run mid-season with my Bayern, leading for about a third of the campaign, but couldn't sustain the juggling act when injuries hit my stars (Duff and, yes, Izzet), and the superior long-term planning of other competitors carried the day. Now, though, I'm probably as fried as the actual players. Guess I'll watch some MLS for the next two and a half months, maybe try to find a way to see bits of EC2004, and just recharge. Oh, as an added bonus: this was the script I put together to make these tables. I'll see if I can't post the code directly here.

posted by taupe at 04:41 PM on May 17, 2004

I got otherwise preoccupied in the last week or so and didn't get around to this last week, or anytime until now. It's easier just to build and post both weeks' tables, so I'll do that. Here's the table after Week 37:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	38	51	2,593	1,840
2	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	57	35	4,119	1,811
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	26	29	5,843	1,793
4	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	48	37	10,063	1,755
5	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	37	11,919	1,740
6	Crap City United	g s p m	20	30	12,235	1,738
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	33	55	13,690	1,729
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	40	34	26,433	1,661
9	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	55	27	34,301	1,627
10	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	60	26	33,580	1,626
11	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	33	35	39,380	1,607
12	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	29	33	40,431	1,603
13	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	37	37	45,610	1,584
14	vagabonds	christopher f	20	27	50,781	1,565
14	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	21	29	50,789	1,565
16	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	28	51	61,463	1,528
17	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	34	33	65,085	1,516
18	last again	eckeric eckeric	9	13	67,622	1,507
19	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	33	24	80,722	1,459
20	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	27	83,887	1,452
21	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	21	84,757	1,449
22	Finally	Mark D	13	38	87,224	1,441
23	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	26	29	89,923	1,432
24	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	35	90,189	1,431
25	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	25	91,405	1,427
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	26	100,837	1,395
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	30	105,061	1,380
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	25	30	120,845	1,325
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	10	128,014	1,299
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	13	201,168	1,001
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	17	32	253,184	639
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	32	47	273,726	484

May
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	1	51	2,400	117
2	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	55	4,145	113
3	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	2	37	12,549	104
4	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	2	47	31,966	95
5	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	0	51	32,331	94
6	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	0	34	38,761	92
7	bluebears	andy griffiths	1	29	58,437	88
7	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	4	35	41,933	88
9	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	2	27	63,735	87
10	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	0	33	74,683	84
11	Finally	Mark D	0	38	85,863	82
11	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	35	85,863	82
11	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	3	32	91,632	82
14	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	37	98,209	80
14	Crap City United	g s p m	1	30	103,708	80
16	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	37	104,628	79
17	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	2	35	117,051	78
18	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	1	30	124,827	76
19	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	26	146,119	73
20	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	1	29	167,243	71
21	vagabonds	christopher f	0	27	168,024	70
22	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	4	26	152,934	69
23	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	3	33	189,382	68
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	21	196,596	66
25	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	27	210,176	64
25	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	30	210,176	64
27	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	1	29	228,793	62
28	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	25	280,024	50
28	tallclay	Clay H	0	10	280,024	50
28	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	2	24	269,436	50
31	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	13	294,209	44
32	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	13	305,579	27

posted by taupe at 04:21 PM on May 17, 2004

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	38	66	3,559	1,789
2	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	53	61	3,926	1,784
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	26	59	5,366	1,764
4	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	46	67	10,530	1,718
5	Crap City United	g s p m	20	50	11,851	1,708
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	43	12,615	1,703
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	32	58	17,459	1,674
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	40	58	26,889	1,627
9	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	58	51	32,233	1,604
10	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	54	60	33,214	1,600
11	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	31	43	40,220	1,572
12	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	29	51	40,742	1,570
13	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	37	42	47,081	1,547
14	vagabonds	christopher f	20	43	49,512	1,538
15	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	20	33	50,072	1,536
16	last again	eckeric eckeric	9	31	62,096	1,494
17	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	31	43	63,117	1,491
18	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	28	43	67,292	1,477
19	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	31	30	78,536	1,439
20	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	45	81,594	1,428
21	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	37	82,491	1,425
22	Finally	Mark D	13	44	89,162	1,403
22	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	26	42	89,229	1,403
24	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	25	89,463	1,402
25	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	47	91,213	1,396
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	47	99,128	1,369
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	34	104,660	1,350
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	24	46	120,357	1,295
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	40	122,043	1,289
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	14	197,583	988
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	17	58	252,111	607
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	30	52	275,081	441

May
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	0	67	6,461	67
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	1	66	7,657	66
3	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	0	61	16,770	61
4	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	1	60	19,489	60
5	bluebears	andy griffiths	1	59	22,434	59
6	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	0	58	25,780	58
6	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	1	58	29,364	58
8	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	0	52	55,011	52
9	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	0	51	61,523	51
10	Crap City United	g s p m	1	50	68,334	50
10	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	3	58	29,364	50
12	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	47	91,076	47
12	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	47	91,076	47
12	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	2	51	99,419	47
15	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	0	46	99,588	46
16	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	45	108,465	45
17	Finally	Mark D	0	44	117,550	44
18	vagabonds	christopher f	0	43	126,988	43
18	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	0	43	126,988	43
18	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	0	43	126,988	43
18	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	0	43	126,988	43
18	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	43	126,988	43
23	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	42	136,589	42
23	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	1	42	146,090	42
25	tallclay	Clay H	0	40	156,360	40
26	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	37	186,376	37
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	34	215,087	34
28	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	33	224,037	33
29	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	31	240,900	31
30	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	0	30	248,593	30
31	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	25	278,950	25
32	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	14	303,206	14

posted by taupe at 08:30 PM on May 06, 2004

Crap almighty, I've fudged that script enough times, and now I've got to unbreak the number links. At least the name links work.

posted by taupe at 06:06 PM on May 01, 2004

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	51	52	4,565	1,727
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	37	43	4,849	1,723
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	24	49	6,460	1,705
4	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	33	12,050	1,660
5	Crap City United	g s p m	19	48	12,400	1,658
6	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	44	48	12,943	1,655
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	31	57	19,837	1,616
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	39	35	30,074	1,569
9	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	56	45	33,113	1,557
10	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	52	48	36,399	1,544
11	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	29	32	39,199	1,533
12	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	29	41	43,043	1,519
13	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	37	45	46,955	1,505
14	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	20	31	47,408	1,503
15	vagabonds	christopher f	20	28	49,753	1,495
16	last again	eckeric eckeric	9	30	59,099	1,463
17	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	31	35	63,754	1,448
18	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	27	59	67,933	1,434
19	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	31	41	75,521	1,409
20	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	16	81,603	1,388
21	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	32	83,134	1,383
22	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	23	85,036	1,377
23	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	25	51	89,902	1,361
24	Finally	Mark D	13	25	90,412	1,359
25	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	33	93,384	1,349
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	24	101,479	1,322
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	27	103,060	1,316
28	tallclay	Clay H	16	21	122,225	1,249
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	24	49	122,248	1,249
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	18	191,965	974
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	14	51	254,270	557
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	30	58	276,407	389

April
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	8	52	16,207	279
2	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	4	57	27,744	268
3	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	4	51	31,640	265
4	vagabonds	christopher f	0	28	42,088	257
5	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	1	32	46,290	255
6	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	31	50,338	252
6	bluebears	andy griffiths	4	49	51,819	252
8	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	8	48	55,656	250
9	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	33	63,236	245
10	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	3	59	66,746	244
11	Crap City United	g s p m	2	48	90,141	233
11	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	2	45	90,141	233
13	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	8	45	92,819	232
14	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	3	35	115,956	222
15	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	3	48	127,986	217
16	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	3	41	132,991	215
17	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	6	43	138,063	213
18	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	24	165,304	201
19	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	32	170,059	199
20	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	12	35	186,755	193
21	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	7	49	198,426	188
22	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	2	41	202,850	186
23	last again	eckeric eckeric	1	30	207,377	184
24	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	3	51	209,747	183
24	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	13	58	209,899	183
26	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	23	209,918	182
27	tallclay	Clay H	0	21	214,207	180
28	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	16	229,074	173
28	Finally	Mark D	0	25	229,074	173
30	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	27	231,079	172
31	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	33	242,229	166
32	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	18	294,420	114

posted by taupe at 02:14 PM on April 27, 2004

(apparently premierleague.com has made changes to their own table code, forcing me to tweak the script I use to generate these)

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	36	79	4,676	1,680
2	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	49	88	4,772	1,679
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	24	65	6,911	1,656
4	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	81	10,501	1,627
5	Crap City United	g s p m	19	71	13,259	1,610
6	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	43	48	13,842	1,607
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	29	68	23,055	1,559
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	39	75	28,813	1,534
9	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	53	90	33,460	1,516
10	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	29	78	37,231	1,501
11	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	51	59	37,581	1,496
12	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	29	76	43,655	1,478
13	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	20	90	45,332	1,472
14	vagabonds	christopher f	20	100	46,803	1,467
15	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	37	64	48,946	1,460
16	last again	eckeric eckeric	9	73	56,919	1,433
17	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	30	66	63,217	1,413
18	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	26	53	74,821	1,375
19	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	76	75,602	1,372
19	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	28	36	75,758	1,372
21	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	61	81,250	1,354
22	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	68	82,083	1,351
23	Finally	Mark D	13	57	87,354	1,334
24	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	23	45	92,242	1,318
25	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	53	92,798	1,316
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	59	98,097	1,298
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	58	100,753	1,289
28	tallclay	Clay H	16	68	118,577	1,228
29	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	17	53	119,668	1,224
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	21	188,633	956
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	13	96	256,343	506
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	30	72	279,258	331

April
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	6	88	19,030	231
2	vagabonds	christopher f	0	100	20,298	229
3	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	1	78	29,359	223
4	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	90	31,517	221
5	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	4	96	45,190	214
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	81	47,364	212
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	3	68	51,003	211
8	bluebears	andy griffiths	4	65	68,242	203
9	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	8	59	61,790	202
10	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	2	64	105,299	188
11	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	3	75	108,041	187
11	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	7	90	108,349	187
13	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	2	53	113,319	185
13	Crap City United	g s p m	2	71	113,319	185
15	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	59	133,043	177
16	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	3	76	143,826	174
17	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	6	79	155,138	170
18	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	2	48	157,634	169
19	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	68	160,759	167
20	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	0	53	171,884	163
21	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	61	183,090	159
21	tallclay	Clay H	0	68	183,090	159
23	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	11	66	188,683	158
24	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	76	188,708	157
25	last again	eckeric eckeric	1	73	199,299	154
26	Finally	Mark D	0	57	212,881	148
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	58	220,511	145
27	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	1	36	222,706	145
29	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	1	45	234,699	140
30	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	53	248,096	133
31	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	13	72	264,708	125
32	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	21	292,601	96

posted by taupe at 01:39 PM on April 22, 2004

As in four. Also as in "Fuck, he had to score four goals".

posted by taupe at 01:24 AM on April 19, 2004

F........... I give up.

posted by taupe at 11:10 PM on April 16, 2004

Bring the table already:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	32	33	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	35	63	14	4,231	1,601
2	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	47	78	25	4,769	1,595
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	22	43	32	5,072	1,591
4	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	43	22	24	8,554	1,559
5	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	62	25	10,274	1,546
6	Crap City United	g s p m	18	63	20	11,453	1,539
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	28	51	44	20,621	1,491
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	39	55	31	28,356	1,459
9	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	46	91	21	31,049	1,449
10	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	51	35	32	36,506	1,430
11	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	29	89	25	38,436	1,423
12	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	28	41	39	44,861	1,402
13	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	35	64	25	45,524	1,400
14	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	20	78	20	51,208	1,382
15	vagabonds	christopher f	20	77	30	56,231	1,367
16	last again	eckeric eckeric	8	43	17	58,419	1,360
17	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	30	50	29	62,869	1,347
18	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	28	26	35	66,526	1,336
19	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	25	32	48	71,153	1,322
20	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	54	13	79,527	1,296
21	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	58	35	80,585	1,293
22	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	53	25	83,714	1,283
23	Finally	Mark D	13	23	31	85,762	1,277
24	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	22	29	18	87,082	1,273
25	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	40	12	90,154	1,263
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	49	28	97,885	1,239
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	45	19	100,209	1,231
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	17	48	25	118,281	1,171
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	58	12	121,454	1,160
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	33	24	179,778	935
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	11	77	15	259,426	414
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	24	35	33	277,436	279

April
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	3	21	5,524	155
2	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	4	25	13,043	147
3	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	1	25	15,440	145
4	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	44	18,764	143
5	bluebears	andy griffiths	2	32	28,817	138
6	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	1	48	44,811	132
7	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	20	45,627	131
7	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	25	45,627	131
9	vagabonds	christopher f	0	30	52,169	129
10	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	25	55,631	128
11	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	2	15	82,075	122
12	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	2	24	86,448	121
13	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	28	96,071	118
14	Crap City United	g s p m	1	20	118,592	114
15	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	3	31	128,730	112
16	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	0	25	134,084	110
17	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	1	35	143,285	109
18	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	5	32	182,803	101
19	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	25	187,486	99
20	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	35	192,136	98
20	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	2	39	196,129	98
22	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	0	18	205,333	95
23	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	11	29	221,965	92
24	Finally	Mark D	0	31	221,978	91
24	tallclay	Clay H	0	12	221,978	91
24	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	5	14	225,758	91
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	19	237,286	87
28	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	13	256,595	81
28	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	17	256,595	81
30	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	12	259,347	80
31	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	24	271,494	75
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	7	33	277,146	73

posted by taupe at 03:10 PM on April 14, 2004

squealy's in first now, pending Everton-Spurs.

posted by taupe at 12:15 PM on April 09, 2004

In the Champions League thing, I've just done an AC Milan.

posted by taupe at 02:42 PM on April 07, 2004

Look at it this way, gspm: at least you won't have that problem with those players anymore this season.

posted by taupe at 02:45 PM on April 06, 2004

YEA BOYEE! Dead last!

posted by taupe at 02:42 PM on April 06, 2004

Keeping the color fade in the 17-20 range, just 'cos:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	32	22	2,934	1,528
2	bluebears	andy griffiths	20	63	3,672	1,516
3	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	41	75	3,922	1,513
4	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	44	52	5,040	1,500
5	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	44	9,906	1,459
6	Crap City United	g s p m	17	31	10,401	1,456
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	26	48	22,657	1,396
8	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	47	46	28,290	1,375
9	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	38	30	28,782	1,373
10	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	44	47	38,607	1,341
11	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	26	18	44,744	1,322
12	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	35	39	48,534	1,311
13	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	28	31	49,182	1,309
14	last again	eckeric eckeric	8	21	52,137	1,300
15	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	22	45	55,003	1,292
16	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	20	33	57,733	1,284
17	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	27	48	61,027	1,275
18	vagabonds	christopher f	20	22	66,284	1,260
19	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	24	52	72,592	1,242
20	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	14	76,938	1,229
21	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	22	48	78,082	1,226
22	Finally	Mark D	13	37	79,051	1,223
23	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	28	83,091	1,211
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	21	84,994	1,205
25	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	5	86,734	1,200
26	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	23	97,492	1,167
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	41	99,288	1,162
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	17	37	118,850	1,098
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	21	121,147	1,090
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	18	176,655	878
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	9	34	260,894	326
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	17	21	273,694	227

April
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	0	75	852	75
2	bluebears	andy griffiths	0	63	7,156	63
3	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	0	52	25,402	52
3	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	1	52	27,919	52
5	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	0	48	37,004	48
5	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	0	48	37,004	48
5	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	0	48	37,004	48
8	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	1	47	44,029	47
9	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	1	46	48,113	46
10	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	44	52,503	44
11	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	41	67,063	41
12	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	39	78,360	39
13	Finally	Mark D	0	37	91,191	37
13	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	0	37	91,191	37
13	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	3	45	98,009	37
16	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	0	34	113,158	34
17	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	33	121,043	33
18	Crap City United	g s p m	0	31	137,992	31
18	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	0	31	137,992	31
20	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	28	164,462	28
21	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	2	30	191,461	26
22	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	23	209,076	23
23	vagabonds	christopher f	0	22	217,504	22
24	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	21	225,591	21
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	21	225,591	21
24	tallclay	Clay H	0	21	225,591	21
24	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	0	21	225,591	21
28	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	18	247,813	18
28	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	0	18	247,813	18
28	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	2	22	254,162	18
31	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	14	270,625	14
32	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	5	293,867	5

posted by taupe at 09:28 PM on April 05, 2004

I dig the description of my team as "balanced" -- for the last couple months, half my squad has been point guards. Next year, maybe I'll take shooting percentages into account.

posted by taupe at 01:32 PM on April 01, 2004

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	30	72	1,747	1,510
2	bluebears	andy griffiths	19	67	5,863	1,453
3	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	42	69	6,496	1,448
4	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	40	52	7,799	1,438
5	Crap City United	g s p m	17	74	9,587	1,425
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	53	11,227	1,415
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	25	50	26,526	1,348
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	35	75	26,866	1,347
9	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	43	61	29,730	1,337
10	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	26	53	39,998	1,304
11	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	43	45	43,462	1,294
12	last again	eckeric eckeric	8	38	48,495	1,279
13	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	28	50	49,011	1,278
14	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	35	48	51,085	1,272
15	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	19	51	56,984	1,255
16	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	19	45	58,425	1,251
17	vagabonds	christopher f	20	53	63,147	1,238
18	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	27	42	67,014	1,227
19	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	23	71,111	1,215
20	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	30	78,210	1,195
21	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	23	45	80,026	1,190
22	Finally	Mark D	13	28	81,323	1,186
23	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	31	81,883	1,184
24	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	40	82,356	1,183
25	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	20	66	82,755	1,182
26	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	35	95,284	1,144
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	33	102,992	1,121
28	tallclay	Clay H	16	54	118,689	1,069
29	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	17	36	120,928	1,061
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	12	173,173	860
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	9	43	261,744	292
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	15	55	271,919	210

March
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	mr kwacky	0	72	3,975	195
2	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	3	69	14,914	182
3	Crap City United	g s p m	4	74	17,677	180
4	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	53	17,741	179
5	vagabonds	christopher f	0	53	24,054	175
6	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	2	48	40,875	168
7	bluebears	andy griffiths	1	67	45,913	166
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	1	75	57,530	162
9	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	0	66	58,384	161
10	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	2	53	64,116	160
11	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	50	67,451	159
12	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	3	61	92,857	152
13	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	40	97,059	150
14	tallclay	Clay H	0	54	100,912	149
14	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	2	51	104,188	149
16	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	2	43	108,196	148
17	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	31	133,075	141
18	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	3	45	141,008	140
19	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	1	45	144,759	139
20	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	6	50	165,781	134
21	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	4	52	189,027	128
22	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	1	45	202,991	124
23	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	35	203,458	123
24	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	5	36	219,960	119
25	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	30	220,047	118
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	33	228,937	115
27	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	2	42	244,437	110
28	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	10	55	253,185	106
29	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	38	263,818	99
30	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	23	270,788	94
31	Finally	Mark D	0	28	282,838	79
32	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	12	290,024	50

Only once in my life did I ever attempt to stage-dive at a concert. It was many years ago. Damn near broke my skull open because there was exactly one person actually below me to catch me. The relevance of this little historical vignette should be immediately obvious. For next year's competition I'm thinking this: (1) We decide on 16, 18, or 20. (2) We invite that many teams into the "pantheon" league, setting some sort of deadline, and then replace no-showers at that deadline with "n00b"-leaguers in the order of the final table this year. Or we could say screw it and just have one big league again next year. If we're having two divisions, though, we need to vote on (1) first, and my vote's for 20.

posted by taupe at 08:12 PM on March 28, 2004

I could still beat trox if Xavier won it all (if they faced pretty much anyone but Pittsburgh in the final). Xavier is, however, the only team I can get points from anymore -- yes, I have one surviving team, and my maximum possible score is 90. Fun fact: a bracket chosen entirely at random can expect an average of 31.5 points the way they've got this set up. All of us have surpassed that threshold but me.

posted by taupe at 12:37 AM on March 23, 2004

I've more or less run out of half-clever things to say and I'm tired, so I'll just post the table and comment later:

March
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	30	53	2,442	1,438
2	bluebears	andy griffiths	19	44	7,208	1,386
2	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	40	41	7,278	1,386
4	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	41	49	8,261	1,379
5	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	60	10,918	1,362
6	Crap City United	g s p m	17	59	13,041	1,351
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	24	40	26,237	1,298
8	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	43	41	33,049	1,276
9	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	34	39	34,341	1,272
10	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	41	21	40,943	1,253
11	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	25	36	41,597	1,251
12	last again	eckeric eckeric	8	24	45,009	1,241
13	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	25	45	46,989	1,236
14	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	35	47	51,498	1,224
15	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	19	32	58,116	1,206
16	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	19	27	58,853	1,204
17	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	21	63,196	1,192
18	vagabonds	christopher f	20	61	65,930	1,185
18	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	26	44	65,966	1,185
20	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	36	73,330	1,165
21	Finally	Mark D	13	19	75,873	1,158
22	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	55	77,577	1,153
23	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	23	23	80,641	1,145
24	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	54	81,348	1,143
25	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	20	46	90,890	1,116
26	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	47	93,040	1,109
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	29	100,206	1,088
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	17	56	119,431	1,025
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	46	122,272	1,015
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	15	165,803	848
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	6	46	261,011	253
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	5	28	267,825	191

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	60	12,827	126
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	0	53	17,649	123
3	vagabonds	christopher f	0	61	19,513	122
4	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	2	47	25,826	120
5	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	2	49	47,108	113
6	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	54	55,190	110
6	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	55	55,190	110
8	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	1	40	62,623	109
9	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	1	36	71,659	107
10	Crap City United	g s p m	4	59	77,199	106
11	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	1	46	81,195	105
12	bluebears	andy griffiths	1	44	113,275	99
12	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	1	21	113,275	99
14	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	2	27	119,435	98
15	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	0	46	131,567	95
15	tallclay	Clay H	0	46	131,567	95
17	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	1	23	142,348	94
18	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	3	45	154,625	92
19	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	3	41	160,455	91
20	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	47	172,076	88
20	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	36	172,076	88
22	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	0	39	177,588	87
22	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	0	28	177,588	87
24	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	5	56	203,969	83
25	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	29	204,061	82
26	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	1	32	222,095	79
27	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	4	41	234,826	76
28	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	21	248,782	71
29	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	1	44	259,533	68
30	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	24	271,377	61
31	Finally	Mark D	0	19	281,283	51
32	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	15	286,188	38

posted by taupe at 09:17 PM on March 22, 2004

...speaking of which, I'll be having a pacemaker fitted tomorrow:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	30	70	3,047	1,385
2	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	37	43	6,073	1,353
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	18	55	7,437	1,342
4	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	39	68	8,690	1,334
5	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	66	14,361	1,302
6	Crap City United	g s p m	16	55	16,728	1,292
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	23	69	25,739	1,258
8	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	41	54	31,607	1,239
9	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	34	48	33,536	1,233
10	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	41	78	33,895	1,232
11	last again	eckeric eckeric	8	37	38,764	1,217
12	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	25	71	39,603	1,215
13	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	22	55	45,443	1,199
14	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	17	75	52,067	1,181
14	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	33	77	52,164	1,181
16	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	18	47	54,668	1,174
17	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	50	55,649	1,171
18	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	26	24	67,036	1,141
19	Finally	Mark D	13	32	67,729	1,139
20	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	52	71,484	1,129
21	vagabonds	christopher f	20	61	73,361	1,124
22	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	23	71	74,090	1,122
23	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	55	82,699	1,098
24	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	56	86,083	1,089
25	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	20	49	92,778	1,070
26	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	41	95,173	1,062
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	53	96,382	1,059
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	12	43	119,395	985
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	49	123,933	969
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	23	159,905	833
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	6	59	262,318	207
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	5	59	266,912	163

March
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	1	78	17,761	78
2	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	77	17,989	77
3	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	0	75	22,733	75
4	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	1	71	38,425	71
4	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	1	71	38,425	71
6	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	0	70	38,840	70
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	0	69	42,803	69
8	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	0	68	47,124	68
9	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	66	56,655	66
10	vagabonds	christopher f	0	61	84,852	61
11	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	0	59	97,956	59
11	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	1	59	104,300	59
13	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	56	119,191	56
14	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	0	55	126,520	55
14	bluebears	andy griffiths	0	55	126,520	55
14	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	55	126,520	55
17	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	1	54	140,990	54
18	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	53	141,552	53
19	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	52	149,363	52
20	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	50	164,669	50
21	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	0	49	172,278	49
21	tallclay	Clay H	0	49	172,278	49
23	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	0	48	179,823	48
24	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	47	187,138	47
24	Crap City United	g s p m	3	55	194,305	47
26	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	0	43	214,933	43
26	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	1	43	220,949	43
28	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	41	227,357	41
29	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	37	248,539	37
30	Finally	Mark D	0	32	266,965	32
31	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	1	24	281,816	24
32	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	23	281,895	23

Not sure what to say about my own performance, except that, um, the whole Tottenham Juggernaut idea didn't pan out at all. While lots of things just didn't happen as expected, I should have known that Chelsea's revolving midfield would eventually burn me badly (Parker's one minute cost me Jason Dodd's shutout), and I've clearly been engaging in Kissinger-in-Vietnam dollar-auction-type behavior vis-a-vis Shearer. I'd need to blow up my squad yet again for a chance at the title, but that'll be counterproductive and probably too late anyway. As for the number of top-flight teams next year, I hope we can even get most everybody to return next year. We'll have to sort out contingencies for replacement of non-returners, and try to balance the size of the two divisions, but keep a hard cap (of probably 20) in the top one..

posted by taupe at 08:59 PM on March 17, 2004

Argh. Somebody(s) else did the coin-flip thing and now I'm going to have to do something else. Scrabble it is. Go Xavier!

posted by taupe at 03:40 PM on March 15, 2004

My concession speech is in the editing stages. 0-0 between Tottenham and Newcastle?! I give up.

posted by taupe at 10:42 AM on March 14, 2004

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	30	60	3,167	1,315
2	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	35	49	3,598	1,310
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	17	51	5,926	1,287
4	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	38	54	8,408	1,270
5	Crap City United	g s p m	13	47	13,051	1,245
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	52	15,100	1,236
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	23	29	28,527	1,189
7	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	33	37	28,581	1,189
9	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	40	57	29,945	1,185
10	last again	eckeric eckeric	8	37	31,417	1,180
11	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	40	48	41,156	1,154
12	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	21	57	43,333	1,148
13	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	24	28	44,829	1,144
14	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	17	39	51,401	1,127
15	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	28	60	52,654	1,124
16	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	29	53,560	1,121
17	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	25	46	55,321	1,117
18	Finally	Mark D	13	31	59,142	1,107
19	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	17	50	59,558	1,106
20	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	27	71,062	1,077
21	vagabonds	christopher f	20	35	76,521	1,063
22	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	21	42	81,072	1,051
23	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	29	83,854	1,043
24	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	26	87,584	1,033
25	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	42	91,679	1,021
25	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	20	40	91,965	1,021
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	47	96,971	1,006
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	12	46	117,359	942
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	29	123,742	920
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	35	153,040	810
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	5	44	263,104	148
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	5	19	267,300	104

February
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	52	10,772	209
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	3	60	12,581	208
3	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	4	49	19,305	203
4	bluebears	andy griffiths	2	51	22,071	201
5	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	4	46	36,347	194
6	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	29	38,142	193
7	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	2	37	50,830	188
8	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	39	57,380	185
9	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	5	54	69,386	182
9	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	8	57	69,539	182
11	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	37	69,570	181
11	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	4	48	72,407	181
13	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	60	79,271	178
14	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	2	40	88,394	176
15	Finally	Mark D	0	31	89,285	175
16	Crap City United	g s p m	1	47	108,979	170
17	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	27	113,394	168
18	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	29	120,431	166
18	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	3	57	123,343	166
20	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	42	123,879	165
21	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	5	46	156,992	156
22	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	2	50	172,102	151
23	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	4	28	178,161	149
24	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	47	178,402	148
24	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	5	44	181,136	148
26	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	26	204,728	138
27	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	3	42	209,273	137
28	vagabonds	christopher f	0	35	213,919	134
28	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	29	213,919	134
30	tallclay	Clay H	0	29	226,056	128
31	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	35	242,020	118
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	5	19	264,225	91

(table late due to McCoy Tyner show and travel)

posted by taupe at 08:10 PM on March 10, 2004

Yeah, you're right; I didn't go through and edit all the links. Have another:


	Team	Manager	T	M	R	P

1	Bayern Mucus 03	D Taupe	3	47	162,841	47
2	New Crapland	g s p m	10	38	165,923	38
3	ATL Arsenal	Tim Truxell	2	37	166,296	37
4	Bosiak Bashers	Joseph Bieda	7	35	167,392	35
5	Blammos	Jim Bob	1	33	168,300	33
6	BillSaysThisSCORES	Bill Lazar	0	27	170,893	27
6	Mossy Ecletic	Emad Mostaque	0	27	170,893	27
6	last again	eric eric	6	27	171,243	27

posted by taupe at 12:15 AM on February 26, 2004


	Team	Manager	T	M	R	P

1	Bayern Mucus 03	D Taupe	3	47	162,841	47
2	New Crapland	g s p m	10	38	165,923	38
3	ATL Arsenal	Tim Truxell	2	37	166,296	37
4	Bosiak Bashers	Joseph Bieda	7	35	167,392	35
5	Blammos	Jim Bob	1	33	168,300	33
6	BillSaysThisSCORES	Bill Lazar	0	27	170,893	27
6	Mossy Ecletic	Emad Mostaque	0	27	170,893	27
6	last again	eric eric	6	27	171,243	27

posted by taupe at 09:35 PM on February 25, 2004

Please note that this is the table as it stood immediately following the last results; it won't be current even by the time you read this, as I intend to soak an immediate four-point penalty for a double switch that I just can't pass up:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	33	42	3,182	1,265
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	28	25	4,064	1,255
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	17	31	6,267	1,236
4	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	35	39	8,782	1,220
5	Crap City United	g s p m	13	26	13,108	1,198
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	32	16,553	1,184
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	23	28	23,682	1,160
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	30	35	25,051	1,156
9	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	35	25	29,046	1,144
10	last again	eckeric eckeric	7	19	29,172	1,143
11	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	24	21	39,505	1,116
12	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	37	27	41,913	1,110
13	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	14	48,657	1,092
14	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	20	30	49,264	1,091
15	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	17	34	50,384	1,088
16	Finally	Mark D	13	29	55,280	1,076
17	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	23	30	57,433	1,071
18	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	27	30	60,298	1,064
19	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	15	19	63,466	1,056
20	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	26	65,955	1,050
21	vagabonds	christopher f	20	18	74,920	1,028
22	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	31	80,104	1,014
23	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	20	33	82,257	1,009
24	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	27	82,987	1,007
25	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	20	36	92,601	981
26	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	24	93,033	979
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	18	100,120	959
28	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	12	36	118,995	899
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	17	121,379	891
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	26	152,197	775
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	5	23	263,382	107
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	4	20	265,345	85

February
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	28	5,513	164
2	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	2	42	11,836	158
3	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	32	12,184	157
4	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	1	35	24,256	151
5	bluebears	andy griffiths	2	31	27,139	150
6	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	2	25	32,273	148
6	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	3	30	32,646	148
8	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	34	35,771	146
9	Finally	Mark D	0	29	41,875	144
9	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	19	41,875	144
11	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	26	52,012	141
11	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	4	25	55,553	141
13	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	31	67,172	137
13	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	2	27	70,316	137
15	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	2	36	74,242	136
16	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	3	39	91,361	132
17	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	24	126,103	123
17	Crap City United	g s p m	1	26	129,287	123
19	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	4	21	138,407	121
20	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	30	146,751	118
21	AVZ Bulls	usf bull	5	36	169,639	113
22	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	27	169,771	112
23	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	3	30	183,411	109
24	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	5	23	190,195	107
25	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	14	193,482	105
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	18	205,420	101
26	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	1	19	207,850	101
28	vagabonds	christopher f	0	18	210,918	99
28	tallclay	Clay H	0	17	210,918	99
30	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	2	33	222,875	95
31	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	26	243,705	83
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	4	20	257,606	72

A lot of people lost points from just yesterday, due to a goal assist (I think) for Thierry Henry being rescinded. Defenders, and keepers who weren't Friedel, obviously got killed. Saha didn't play, and now Solskjaer wants to come back, so scratch what I said last week about Saha. And of course LFC's game was postponed. The next update, the last one for the February competition, may or may not come as soon as 9 March (!). That's when the last game of "Week 27" (Boro-Spurs) is scheduled, and I'll be out of town then, and at a concert the evening of the 9th.

posted by taupe at 03:22 PM on February 22, 2004

Oh, and it would also help if I reposted the code to join. Our league name is "spofi"; the code is "1000650@_173064".

posted by taupe at 01:19 PM on February 19, 2004

Thanks, wc. I don't have a job doing this; I'm just some guy looking for meaning in relevant data. (The gameweek histories are the source, from which it took me about four minutes to make a manual histogram in a text editor: here's kWaCkY's, and here's mine.)

posted by taupe at 02:59 AM on February 13, 2004

Factoids: (1) I have 8 more transfer penalty points than kWaCkY, who leads me by 7 points. (2) kWaCkY's performance has been more consistent and more normally distributed around a higher median (his: 51; mine: 47), while I've just got more outliers: Kwitters Bayern 90+ X 85-89 80-84 X 75-79 X X 70-74 X XXX 65-69 XXX 60-64 XX XXXX 55-59 XXX XXXX 50-54 X XXX 45-49 XXXXX XX 40-44 XXX XX 35-39 XXXX XX 30-34 XX X 0-29 X

posted by taupe at 12:34 AM on February 13, 2004

Get used to this (see below):

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	27	73	3,745	1,230
2	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	32	32	4,508	1,223
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	15	63	6,729	1,205
4	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	35	52	10,157	1,181
5	Crap City United	g s p m	12	43	12,836	1,172
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	70	17,939	1,152
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	23	61	24,096	1,132
8	last again	eckeric eckeric	7	63	26,609	1,124
9	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	30	54	27,844	1,121
10	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	33	51	28,607	1,119
11	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	21	53	34,381	1,103
12	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	36	63	42,255	1,083
13	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	50	43,904	1,078
14	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	19	54	50,986	1,061
15	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	17	59	53,869	1,054
16	Finally	Mark D	13	52	56,705	1,047
17	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	21	49	57,561	1,045
18	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	15	34	60,951	1,037
19	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	27	40	62,236	1,034
20	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	48	66,217	1,024
21	vagabonds	christopher f	20	53	72,011	1,010
22	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	51	82,520	983
23	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	42	83,790	980
24	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	19	31	85,387	976
25	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	44	92,859	955
26	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	18	44	95,238	949
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	37	98,003	941
28	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	27	117,830	879
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	48	119,337	874
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	33	152,744	749
31	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	0	59	261,129	100
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	4	25	265,107	65

February
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	61	5,412	136
2	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	63	19,499	125
2	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	70	19,499	125
4	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	1	73	26,030	123
5	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	1	49	28,675	122
6	bluebears	andy griffiths	0	63	35,207	119
7	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	1	54	48,109	116
7	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	1	32	48,109	116
7	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	2	51	48,583	116
10	Finally	Mark D	0	52	48,876	115
10	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	48	48,876	115
12	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	59	60,595	112
13	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	1	63	72,491	110
14	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	1	53	81,476	108
15	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	51	86,773	106
16	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	0	44	96,070	104
17	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	0	59	114,834	100
18	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	44	119,531	99
19	Crap City United	g s p m	0	43	128,842	97
20	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	27	146,974	93
20	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	3	52	132,690	93
22	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	50	155,489	91
23	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	40	167,975	88
24	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	42	179,725	85
25	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	37	186,993	83
26	tallclay	Clay H	0	48	190,635	82
26	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	1	34	193,867	82
28	vagabonds	christopher f	0	53	194,204	81
29	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	2	54	203,964	79
30	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	1	31	244,919	62
31	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	33	251,083	57
32	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	4	25	258,015	52

It's been a fun ride at the top, but I don't see our boys getting back there again this season, for the simple reason that I intend to stick to my season-long refusal to collect any points from Arsenal or Manchester United players. (This, and not any anticipation of lost playing time, was why I sold Louis Saha immediately upon his acquisition of a red shirt.) Man U now have an insanely cheap strike partner for Ruud, and it's now essentially suicide to attempt to win your league without at least two of Henry, van Nistelrooy and Saha (at least now that Alan Shearer has totally lost form), let alone none of them. My task now is to continue blowing up my team and scrounge for what value I can find until Muzzy Izzet's injury situation is resolved, and then continue to do the same. I've got some ideas, but they'll have to wait until I can simply right the ship, which will take an intensity of swotting I haven't bothered with since the early part of the season.

posted by taupe at 07:46 PM on February 11, 2004

As for my own boys, it was clearly gut-check time after a mediocre February, and apparently my earlier pessimistic outburst about my fictional squad lit the desired fire under the players who couldn't hear me and don't even know who I am. That's how I'll explain it. Really I got insanely lucky -- you don't typically have two of your defenders score and your plan-B captain (chosen in belief that the injury to Laurent Robert would put Newcastle's attack off balance) nab a double and an assist. Speaking of Robbie Keane, of course I'll sound biased when I say this, but I'm appalled that he didn't earn a bonus for statistically outperforming both Saha and van Nistelrooy, both of whom got bonuses to match his point total. It seems there's plenty of love from the Press Association for the typical red-shirted goalhanger, but not for Irish forwards with unimaginative goal celebrations who play for deservedly unfashionable clubs. Or something. But mostly I'm just glad my fat's out of the fryer for a couple more weeks.

posted by taupe at 02:55 PM on February 08, 2004

Staying on the multicolor tip:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	31	84	2,117	1,191
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	27	50	5,371	1,157
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	15	56	7,496	1,142
4	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	32	45	9,158	1,133
5	Crap City United	g s p m	12	54	9,877	1,129
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	55	22,487	1,082
7	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	32	69	26,160	1,072
8	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	21	75	26,442	1,071
9	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	30	62	28,024	1,067
10	last again	eckeric eckeric	7	62	30,088	1,061
11	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	20	55	34,610	1,050
12	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	41	43,457	1,028
13	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	35	47	47,157	1,020
14	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	17	29	50,890	1,011
15	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	14	48	54,438	1,003
16	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	20	73	57,648	996
17	Finally	Mark D	13	63	57,971	995
17	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	17	53	58,005	995
19	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	27	48	58,541	994
20	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	67	66,310	976
21	vagabonds	christopher f	20	28	74,402	957
22	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	18	31	79,497	945
23	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	43	82,330	938
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	55	84,581	932
25	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	55	92,600	911
26	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	18	60	95,094	905
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	46	95,442	904
28	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	66	112,928	852
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	34	120,932	826
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	24	150,245	716
31	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	0	39	261,537	52
32	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	0	41	263,752	41

February
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	0	84	436	84
2	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	0	75	4,162	75
3	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	0	73	6,264	73
4	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	1	69	15,626	69
5	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	67	18,510	67
6	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	66	21,636	66
7	Finally	Mark D	0	63	33,249	63
8	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	62	37,933	62
8	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	1	62	42,948	62
10	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	0	60	48,660	60
11	bluebears	andy griffiths	0	56	74,614	56
12	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	0	55	81,846	55
12	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	55	81,846	55
12	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	55	81,846	55
12	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	55	81,846	55
16	Crap City United	g s p m	0	54	89,250	54
17	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	53	96,889	53
18	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	1	50	127,854	50
19	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	0	48	136,062	48
19	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	48	136,062	48
21	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	0	47	143,701	47
22	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	46	151,322	46
23	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	0	45	158,821	45
24	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	43	173,242	43
25	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	41	186,679	41
25	The Phat Cats	garfield one bad SpoFo!	0	41	186,679	41
27	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	0	39	199,164	39
28	tallclay	Clay H	0	34	225,139	34
29	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	0	31	237,032	31
30	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	0	29	243,533	29
31	vagabonds	christopher f	0	28	246,481	28
32	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	24	255,354	24

I haven't much weighed in on the division split, but it seems commonsensical to me to have no fewer than sixteen of us in whatever top flight we're having, because (1) there are 32 of us now and (2) it's an even number, lending just that extra degree of unnecessary verisimilitude.

posted by taupe at 02:53 PM on February 08, 2004

Prediction: kWaCkY will be in first by Sunday evening. My midfield's decimated.

posted by taupe at 12:30 AM on February 07, 2004

Okay, "Tomorrow" was good.

posted by taupe at 07:36 PM on February 01, 2004

Pregame: Astronauts. What the shit? First half: No spectacular commercials that I caught. Loved the field position war -- it had become obvious that Carolina would not have a chance of scoring until they could receive a New England post-score kickoff -- but then New England did score, and everything went to hell. Come on, guys, what the shit. I want to see both quarterbacks and at least three receivers burst into several pieces like broken Micronauts next half. Halftime: WHAT THE SHIT????? Please, somebody, nerve-gas Houston before the third quarter. The players could seal off the locker rooms and be safe. Just kill Kid Rock.

posted by taupe at 07:34 PM on February 01, 2004

...and the table itself undergoes an experimental transformation -- let me know if this looks too distracting and weird:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	29	46	4,104	1,111
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	26	56	4,534	1,107
3	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	31	53	7,244	1,088
4	bluebears	andy griffiths	14	60	7,481	1,086
5	Crap City United	g s p m	12	60	9,472	1,075
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	41	22,588	1,027
7	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	28	54	31,068	1,005
8	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	31	45	31,901	1,003
9	last again	eckeric eckeric	6	56	33,274	999
10	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	20	49	34,660	996
11	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	19	46	35,057	995
12	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	37	38,192	987
13	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	16	38	40,632	982
14	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	33	50	42,923	977
15	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	13	56	52,583	955
16	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	14	35	54,966	950
17	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	27	55	56,899	946
18	Finally	Mark D	13	30	63,321	932
19	vagabonds	christopher f	20	32	64,735	929
20	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	20	54	67,354	923
21	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	16	52	69,558	918
22	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	42	73,591	909
23	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	38	79,679	895
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	29	87,058	877
25	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	49	94,876	858
26	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	38	95,393	856
27	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	18	49	99,837	845
28	tallclay	Clay H	16	28	117,601	792
29	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	35	119,410	786
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	19	145,225	692
31	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	0	13	259,598	13

January
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	2	53	2,198	218
2	Crap City United	g s p m	1	60	15,246	200
3	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	4	56	18,597	198
4	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	41	27,480	192
5	bluebears	andy griffiths	3	60	59,555	180
5	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	3	50	59,555	180
7	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	1	54	65,225	178
8	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	37	69,693	176
9	last again	eckeric eckeric	1	56	95,687	169
10	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	42	104,208	166
11	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	49	107,735	165
11	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	4	46	110,891	165
13	tallclay	Clay H	0	28	114,973	163
14	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	3	45	121,476	162
14	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	3	49	121,476	162
16	vagabonds	christopher f	0	32	122,142	161
17	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	4	56	128,853	160
18	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	2	46	142,585	156
18	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	3	54	142,779	156
20	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	4	49	149,767	154
21	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	10	55	153,503	153
22	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	2	35	162,902	150
23	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	35	166,742	148
23	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	3	52	169,274	148
25	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	29	192,222	139
26	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	38	199,415	136
27	Finally	Mark D	0	30	213,791	129
28	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	4	38	220,301	126
29	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	6	38	225,772	122
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	19	231,254	116
31	JasonSpaceman	Jason Wilder	0	13	259,448	13

Jason's squad looks solid enough, once you get past two of the players being injured, one suspended this week, and another on assignment in Tunisia. Meanwhile, my own days at the top may well be numbered, as I struggle to recover from The Unsettling and wait for Muzzy Izzet to come back. I don't know if we're doing 15ses or 20ses or what, hence the two extra color strata.

posted by taupe at 07:23 PM on February 01, 2004

Don't get me wrong, here, because yes, I do like playing the wire. It's just the same-day grab-and-dump that I wonder about, where it's not even possible for the player in question to put up numbers for the team that selected and deselected him. The objection here is that, conceivably, someone intent upon paralysing everyone else's roster could just sit down and grab and dump free agent after free agent, throwing them all into waivers and engendering chaos for other managers also trying to play the wire. I can understand if it's been unintentional up to this point, and since it's just ever been one player at a time, it wouldn't really be something to take to the commissioner. Hell, I may even have done it once. I just hope that if people keep in mind how that kind of thing could look, they'll be a little more careful making these moves.

posted by taupe at 06:51 PM on January 24, 2004

Panthers: Panthers : 2003-4 :: Patriots : 2001-2. Rod Smart (!!!!). Why not. Under (as a differentiator).

posted by taupe at 01:21 PM on January 24, 2004

Suddenly I'm worried. dusted has caught me in total transactions with his latest double grab. Enjoy Ruben Patterson's bricks at the free-throw line, dusted. But...do I have a stable lineup now? Gasp! Actually, there's something in his pattern of moves over the last month or so that's padded that total, and that I'm not sure I entirely like -- namely the tendency to pick a player up as a free agent and then immediately dump that same player for another, rendering the grabbed-and-dumped player inaccessible to everyone for three days. This kind of thing has ripe potential for abuse, and may eventually be something worth taking up with the commissioner...if only the commissioner (catfish) hadn't apparently lost interest himself about a month ago (last activity: Dec 16). Don't get me wrong; I'm not trying to take all this too seriously. Just clearing the air.

posted by taupe at 12:02 PM on January 24, 2004

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	28	47	3,371	1,065
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	25	51	4,990	1,051
3	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	31	69	7,438	1,035
4	bluebears	andy griffiths	13	36	9,144	1,026
5	Crap City United	g s p m	12	48	11,535	1,015
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	54	19,916	986
7	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	30	40	30,978	958
8	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	17	26	33,025	953
9	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	28	42	34,033	951
10	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	61	34,165	950
11	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	19	26	35,684	947
12	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	16	30	36,972	944
13	last again	eckeric eckeric	6	39	37,283	943
14	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	17	33	44,842	927
14	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	32	47	44,963	927
16	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	13	38	50,521	915
17	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	12	31	56,413	903
18	Finally	Mark D	13	31	56,937	902
19	vagabonds	christopher f	20	45	59,528	897
20	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	18	38	70,888	873
21	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	38	73,672	867
22	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	15	33	74,122	866
23	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	14	29	78,226	857
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	33	82,074	848
25	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	37	94,641	818
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	42	98,487	809
27	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	17	32	101,878	800
28	tallclay	Clay H	16	43	114,242	764
29	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	40	118,317	751
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	34	139,823	673

January
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	2	69	1,586	165
2	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	54	10,371	151
3	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	4	51	28,916	142
4	Crap City United	g s p m	1	48	33,539	140
5	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	61	34,434	139
6	tallclay	Clay H	0	43	47,100	135
7	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	33	50,710	134
8	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	2	47	69,353	130
9	vagabonds	christopher f	0	45	70,302	129
10	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	38	92,748	124
10	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	1	42	96,118	124
12	bluebears	andy griffiths	2	36	115,520	120
13	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	3	47	120,803	119
14	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	2	32	129,998	117
14	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	3	40	130,376	117
16	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	42	130,982	116
17	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	1	38	139,162	115
18	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	0	26	140,400	114
19	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	40	145,229	113
19	last again	eckeric eckeric	1	39	148,650	113
21	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	33	158,845	110
22	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	3	31	171,262	108
23	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	1	38	178,917	106
24	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	3	26	183,146	105
25	Finally	Mark D	0	31	200,476	99
26	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	37	203,651	98
27	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	34	206,504	97
28	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	2	33	211,248	96
29	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	4	30	227,081	88
30	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	6	29	232,309	84

Not much to add except Dudek's back, Okocha and bunches of other players are in Tunisia for a while, and I'm obviously as aggravated as anyone that Liverpool blew it at the death today. Cost me eight freakin' points.

posted by taupe at 05:50 PM on January 21, 2004

I too have wanted to see Simon Simon Revolution. I'll also confirm that MAX2 kicks MAX(1)'s ass. I'll also take New England and Carolina, not that it matters.

posted by taupe at 04:49 PM on January 12, 2004

...but first the table:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	27	36	3,442	1,022
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	25	69	5,363	1,006
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	12	55	6,865	996
4	Crap City United	g s p m	11	56	12,371	970
5	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	30	45	13,591	966
6	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	17	45	25,826	930
7	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	39	26,436	928
8	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	13	36	28,215	924
8	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	28	43	28,385	924
10	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	18	37	31,774	916
11	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	27	46	33,675	912
12	last again	eckeric eckeric	6	45	34,259	910
13	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	60	41,083	895
14	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	17	64	42,207	893
15	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	30	63	45,341	887
16	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	10	41	50,476	876
17	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	13	40	51,993	873
18	Finally	Mark D	13	24	53,006	871
19	vagabonds	christopher f	20	59	59,657	858
20	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	11	26	70,072	836
21	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	18	34	72,023	832
22	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	15	38	73,376	829
23	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	49	73,836	828
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	37	78,765	817
25	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	35	93,101	784
26	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	16	40	100,022	767
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	45	100,762	765
28	tallclay	Clay H	16	54	114,583	725
29	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	36	121,075	704
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	22	140,898	631

January
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	64	20,354	100
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	4	69	32,443	97
3	tallclay	Clay H	0	54	32,461	96
3	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	1	45	35,363	96
5	Crap City United	g s p m	0	56	36,209	95
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	39	44,211	93
7	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	0	45	53,122	91
8	vagabonds	christopher f	0	59	58,069	90
8	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	0	63	58,069	90
8	bluebears	andy griffiths	1	55	62,077	90
11	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	0	46	85,500	85
11	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	49	85,500	85
13	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	60	91,391	84
13	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	1	40	96,489	84
15	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	1	43	97,517	83
16	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	1	41	115,123	81
17	last again	eckeric eckeric	1	45	121,345	80
18	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	37	122,269	79
19	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	2	36	146,235	76
20	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	37	157,916	74
21	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	1	40	163,210	73
22	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	45	163,849	72
23	Finally	Mark D	0	24	184,164	68
23	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	1	36	188,266	68
25	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	36	193,030	66
26	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	1	34	197,229	65
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	35	201,225	64
28	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	3	26	208,134	63
29	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	2	38	219,753	59
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	22	226,490	55

And of course the error was: Who was credited as Liverpool's goalkeeper? It should have been freakin' Paul Jones, just signed on loan from Southampton. The site has him as a Saint in week 21, with zero minutes against Birmingham. Bad, bad, bad. So what happened to...uh, me? I don't know; what happened to Muzzy Izzet? None of the team news mentioned anything about the Achilles problem that's mysteriously just shown up on Physioroom's table. Wayne Bridge just got a weekend off, I guess, and then there was everyone else who underperformed. All I can say is, don't count on Bayern's crappy form to continue like this. Oh: and make note of the match schedules for the next two weeks.

posted by taupe at 06:00 PM on January 11, 2004

I was going to wait out the other picks and seize upon one of the lesser-chosen permutations (as it's the only way my overall record could be competitive again), but then, that's what I did last week, and look how well that worked. New England, Kansas City, St. Louis, Philadelphia.

posted by taupe at 05:58 PM on January 09, 2004

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	25	40	2,094	986
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	21	36	7,122	945
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	11	35	7,836	941
4	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	29	51	12,777	921
5	Crap City United	g s p m	11	39	14,723	914
6	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	54	23,567	889
7	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	12	32	24,043	888
8	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	16	44	24,958	886
9	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	17	46	25,372	885
10	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	27	40	27,132	881
11	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	27	39	34,041	866
12	last again	eckeric eckeric	6	35	34,231	865
13	Finally	Mark D	13	44	43,221	847
14	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	24	49,191	835
14	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	9	40	49,334	835
16	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	12	33	50,373	833
17	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	17	36	52,503	829
18	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	30	27	55,269	824
19	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	8	45	58,188	818
20	vagabonds	christopher f	20	31	68,057	799
21	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	17	31	68,506	798
22	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	15	25	71,896	791
23	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	42	77,035	780
24	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	36	77,689	779
25	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	29	90,975	749
26	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	15	47	98,957	730
27	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	30	101,564	723
28	tallclay	Clay H	16	42	119,464	671
29	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	30	120,333	668
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	33	136,873	609

January
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	54	14,251	54
2	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	0	51	24,797	51
3	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	0	47	46,768	47
4	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	0	46	53,660	46
5	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	45	61,208	45
6	Finally	Mark D	0	44	69,286	44
6	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	0	44	69,286	44
8	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	42	86,750	42
8	tallclay	Clay H	0	42	86,750	42
10	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	0	40	105,746	40
10	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	0	40	105,746	40
10	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	0	40	105,746	40
13	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	0	39	115,778	39
13	Crap City United	g s p m	0	39	115,778	39
15	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	36	145,515	36
15	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	0	36	145,515	36
15	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	36	145,515	36
18	bluebears	andy griffiths	0	35	155,273	35
18	last again	eckeric eckeric	1	35	164,422	35
20	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	33	173,710	33
20	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	33	173,710	33
22	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	0	32	182,298	32
23	vagabonds	christopher f	0	31	190,275	31
23	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	0	31	190,275	31
25	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	30	197,599	30
25	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	30	197,599	30
27	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	29	204,387	29
28	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	0	27	215,956	27
29	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	24	228,261	24
30	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	2	25	237,191	21

In a development related only in the most cosmic sense, I literally punched myself in the jaw this afternoon. Please don't ask how I managed it, because I don't entirely know. It's still a little sore.

posted by taupe at 08:17 PM on January 07, 2004

Baltimore, Denver, Dallas, Green Bay.

posted by taupe at 07:47 PM on January 02, 2004

I WILL remember not to draft Wally Szczerbiak.

posted by taupe at 11:04 PM on December 30, 2003

Usually I just run the page code through a Perl script I wrote to generate these, but this time I had to mess with it by hand to get the extra gameweek score column in:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	18	19	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	25	41	47	1,784	946
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	20	58	68	5,725	909
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	10	54	56	6,156	906
4	Crap City United	g s p m	11	44	51	13,502	875
5	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	28	56	44	15,226	870
6	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	11	44	35	20,048	856
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	16	34	37	25,697	842
8	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	26	54	40	26,232	841
9	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	17	53	44	26,992	839
10	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	78	39	28,609	835
11	last again	eckeric eckeric	5	65	37	30,925	830
12	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	26	47	53	32,758	827
13	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	52	42	67,533	219
14	Finally	Mark D	0	21	26	44,608	803
15	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	12	49	35	46,195	800
16	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	30	62	38	47,972	797
17	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	9	46	50	48,804	795
18	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	17	35	45	49,971	793
19	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	8	21	35	60,567	773
20	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	13	36	31	62,195	770
21	vagabonds	christopher f	20	59	46	63,323	768
22	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	16	50	42	63,774	767
23	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	45	35	75,872	743
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	34	49	78,124	738
25	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	27	29	86,554	720
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	50	27	98,312	693
27	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	15	33	35	102,145	683
28	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	32	43	117,951	638
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	45	44	120,883	629
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	25	23	135,904	576

December
	Team	Manager	T	18	19	R	P
1	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	3	53	44	1,308	275
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	4	58	68	2,206	270
3	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	45	35	3,272	265
4	bluebears	andy griffiths	2	54	56	5,974	259
5	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	5	41	47	6,717	258
6	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	3	56	44	17,672	245
7	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	65	37	19,249	243
7	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	3	62	38	20,189	243
9	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	4	50	42	21,687	242
10	Finally	Mark D	0	21	26	24,932	239
11	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	2	46	50	29,176	237
12	Crap City United	g s p m	1	44	51	34,417	234
13	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	3	47	53	49,522	227
14	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	78	39	50,032	226
15	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	4	49	35	61,952	222
16	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	52	42	67,533	219
17	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	21	35	81,366	214
17	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	34	49	81,366	214
19	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	34	37	106,093	206
20	vagabonds	christopher f	0	59	46	112,473	203
21	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	2	33	35	117,491	202
22	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	7	54	40	129,026	198
23	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	3	44	35	139,443	194
24	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	35	45	139,914	193
25	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	32	43	150,132	189
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	50	27	152,609	188
27	tallclay	Clay H	0	45	44	157,439	186
28	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	0	36	31	174,659	178
29	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	27	29	182,208	174
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	25	23	214,156	148

Something we haven't talked about a lot is team value, and how busy you have to be on the transfer market to keep it afloat. squealy's Ardley Athletic, with whose composition squealy has messed with 28 times, lead the value table as of this writing at 105.0; at bottom are ttrendel's Trendelmaniacs, operated on autopilot, at 95.0. I still have no idea what the transfer market mechanics are, but obviously the gains are all concentrated among relatively few players, and the average player's value will slowly erode by default. Of course there's not going to be a lot of cashing in on value gains thanks to the agent-fee thing, but there's no corresponding factor blunting the effect of value losses on a team's potential to work better players in.

posted by taupe at 12:05 AM on December 30, 2003

The "for-amateurs" table:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	25	55	1,240	858
2	bluebears	andy griffiths	10	24	10,464	793
3	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	20	33	13,556	783
4	Crap City United	g s p m	11	40	14,453	780
5	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	10	35	15,538	777
6	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	16	53	19,020	768
7	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	27	30	19,528	767
8	Finally	Mark D	13	47	24,117	756
9	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	24	36	28,511	747
10	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	15	58	28,879	746
11	last again	eckeric eckeric	5	44	38,116	728
11	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	25	42	38,480	728
13	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	27	43,836	718
14	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	23	44,320	717
14	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	8	41	44,461	717
16	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	12	33	45,094	716
17	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	17	28	48,699	710
18	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	9	43	54,972	699
19	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	13	37	56,157	697
20	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	28	34	58,061	694
21	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	14	28	68,751	675
22	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	23	74,402	664
23	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	52	75,350	663
23	vagabonds	christopher f	20	38	75,417	663
25	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	41	79,294	655
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	34	97,598	616
27	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	15	44	98,022	615
28	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	40	116,816	563
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	27	124,136	540
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	33	127,467	528

December
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Finally	Mark D	0	47	505	192
2	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	52	1,297	185
3	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	1	58	1,914	182
4	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	5	55	6,843	170
5	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	41	16,916	158
6	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	2	28	30,259	150
7	bluebears	andy griffiths	2	24	38,242	146
8	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	4	33	42,984	144
9	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	2	30	47,282	142
10	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	44	47,894	141
10	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	2	43	49,682	141
12	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	1	34	51,910	140
13	Crap City United	g s p m	1	40	54,481	139
14	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	4	33	57,699	138
15	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	2	44	68,267	134
16	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	53	74,033	132
17	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	41	74,723	131
18	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	2	42	86,141	128
19	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	23	93,200	125
20	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	23	116,481	118
21	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	2	35	129,072	115
22	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	40	129,796	114
23	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	34	139,650	111
24	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	28	142,864	110
25	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	27	146,140	109
26	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	0	37	158,285	105
27	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	5	36	163,945	104
28	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	33	172,547	100
29	vagabonds	christopher f	0	38	177,633	98
30	tallclay	Clay H	0	27	180,087	97

Postponements happen, and more certainly will, and if there's anything to be learned it may be the value of having fifteen guys on your squad who are all likely to play any given week rather than padding with the James McEveleys of the league (not picking on anyone in particular, just noting how oddly popular McEveley was at the beginning of the season for someone who'd never appear in a game). We'll also need to remember to watch for when those lost games will be rescheduled (on the home page and the deadlines page, or any reputable news source), and be ready for those double weeks like those we had before. Remember also that Boxing Day and the games the following Sunday are both considered "gameweeks," with all of two days to change your roster between them. If you're going to be traveling after Christmas, this would be something to consider. I think I'm just going to do the one update for both rounds on the 28th. In the meantime, heartily enjoy whatever it is you celebrate, and be safe.

posted by taupe at 08:37 PM on December 22, 2003

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	21	74	1,673	811
2	bluebears	andy griffiths	9	61	7,603	766
3	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	19	67	12,020	750
4	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	9	43	14,492	742
5	Crap City United	g s p m	11	52	15,225	740
6	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	26	68	17,770	734
7	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	21	43	22,423	723
8	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	16	54	27,603	712
9	Finally	Mark D	13	68	29,060	709
10	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	48	36,933	694
11	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	38	38,710	691
12	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	15	47	40,675	688
13	last again	eckeric eckeric	5	60	42,789	684
14	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	12	58	43,541	683
14	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	23	48	43,716	683
16	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	17	44	46,059	679
17	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	8	59	47,767	676
18	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	28	49	59,623	657
19	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	8	51	59,938	656
20	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	13	32	61,244	654
21	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	13	58	65,394	647
22	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	40	68,510	641
23	vagabonds	christopher f	20	30	77,929	625
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	36	83,428	614
25	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	60	85,077	611
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	42	98,343	582
27	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	14	56	102,722	571
28	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	35	119,514	523
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	37	122,645	513
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	31	127,789	495

December
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Finally	Mark D	0	68	555	145
2	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	60	3,047	133
3	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	1	47	9,549	124
4	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	1	74	10,547	123
5	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	1	58	11,638	122
6	bluebears	andy griffiths	1	61	15,644	119
7	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	59	17,564	117
8	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	3	67	30,995	111
9	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	1	68	33,428	109
10	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	4	58	46,723	105
11	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	1	49	51,980	103
12	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	48	52,797	102
13	Crap City United	g s p m	1	52	64,986	99
14	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	1	51	68,445	98
15	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	60	69,283	97
16	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	40	76,381	95
17	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	36	95,355	90
17	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	1	56	98,421	90
19	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	0	48	123,282	83
20	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	38	127,346	82
21	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	1	43	138,587	80
21	Cottage Cheesers	worldcup 2002	2	43	138,925	80
23	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	44	139,387	79
24	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	42	147,240	77
25	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	54	154,543	76
26	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	35	158,671	74
27	tallclay	Clay H	0	37	172,515	70
28	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	31	182,111	67
29	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	0	32	195,731	62
30	vagabonds	christopher f	0	30	200,152	60

Meanwhile the real EPL table has come to look like the bowels of a middle-aged American, with the compacted bits of undigested meat being the sixteen teams within ten points of each other. The scary part is how Leeds were second from bottom and Fulham fourth from top before today's late game, and how they were still in those respective places after Leeds beat Fulham.

posted by taupe at 02:28 PM on December 14, 2003

We have more space! Thank you, Pantheon!

posted by taupe at 12:01 PM on December 13, 2003

Totally unrelated and not meant to hijack, but does Soccernet do this on purpose? (See also the big headline for the same story on the main page.)

posted by taupe at 03:36 PM on December 11, 2003

If my team's a "buy", it can only be a long-term buy, 'cos I'd do well just to tread water until Wally and Thud come back, if they ever do. It would have been wise to put a put option on my shooting percentages.

posted by taupe at 05:16 PM on December 08, 2003

Izzet was only supposed to be suspended for this week for accumulation of yellows, and I'm surprised the red insignia is still there. Henry is doubtful for the CL game against Lokomotiv Moscow, and that's all I know about him.

posted by taupe at 11:56 AM on December 08, 2003

And it's "hemorrhaging", not "hemmorhaging". My bad.

posted by taupe at 05:33 PM on December 07, 2003

For those who may miss the goddam interview that this post pushed off the page, there's the link to it.

posted by taupe at 05:31 PM on December 07, 2003

...it's Andy Griffiths's bluebears, vaulting the Fooker into second place:

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	21	49	3,550	737
2	bluebears	andy griffiths	8	58	9,937	705
3	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	8	37	11,717	699
4	Crap City United	g s p m	11	47	15,627	688
5	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	16	48	16,098	687
6	Charlton Emulators	F'd Off	20	37	19,111	680
7	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	25	41	25,760	666
8	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	16	26	29,934	658
9	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	44	32,425	653
10	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	54	36,453	646
11	Finally	Mark D	13	77	39,751	641
11	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	14	77	39,779	641
13	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	8	59	42,134	637
14	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	17	35	43,561	635
14	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	23	35	43,637	635
16	last again	eckeric eckeric	5	37	50,357	624
17	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	13	30	51,871	622
18	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	8	58	55,008	617
19	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	27	54	61,041	608
20	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	7	47	62,612	605
21	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	55	64,927	601
22	vagabonds	christopher f	20	30	69,108	595
23	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	12	64	72,605	589
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	54	78,655	578
25	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	73	92,670	551
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	35	97,644	540
27	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	13	34	107,685	515
28	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	39	117,022	488
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	33	120,898	476
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	36	124,375	464

December
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Finally	Mark D	0	77	563	77
1	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	0	77	563	77
3	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	73	1,442	73
4	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	0	64	8,619	64
5	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	0	59	18,974	59
6	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	58	21,711	58
6	bluebears	andy griffiths	0	58	21,711	58
8	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	55	31,844	55
9	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	54	35,825	54
9	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	54	35,825	54
9	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	0	54	35,825	54
12	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	1	49	64,042	49
13	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	0	48	64,189	48
14	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	0	47	69,699	47
14	Crap City United	g s p m	1	47	75,319	47
16	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	44	87,424	44
17	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	0	41	106,722	41
18	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	0	39	120,101	39
19	last again	eckeric eckeric	0	37	133,575	37
19	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	0	37	133,575	37
19	Charlton Emulators	F'd Off	1	37	140,120	37
22	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	36	140,335	36
23	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	0	35	147,027	35
23	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	35	147,027	35
23	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	35	147,027	35
26	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	0	34	153,587	34
27	tallclay	Clay H	0	33	160,044	33
28	vagabonds	christopher f	0	30	177,846	30
28	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	0	30	177,846	30
30	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	2	26	211,725	22

The top eight from this week all had Seabiscuit as their captain, as did tied-for-ninth skronk and top-half gspm. My 49 was the best for a team that didn't have the guy, which is cold comfort. When your captain fails to appear, your first eligible substitute becomes your new captain; fortunes here ranged from kWaCkY winning the lottery with Michael Svensson, bagging him 20 points, to corpse's 12 for Lee Carsley, to Fat Buddha (Naysmith, 6) and Clay H (Biscan, 4). Of course it helps if you have an eligible substitute, as StarFucker, catfish and mossy didn't; they all ate the goose egg for Henry. In other news, squealy will enjoy his score. I hope.

posted by taupe at 05:30 PM on December 07, 2003

Overall
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	18	36	3,103	696
2	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	8	24	9,531	662
3	bluebears	andy griffiths	8	37	14,363	647
4	Charlton Emulators	F'd Off	19	42	16,152	643
5	Crap City United	g s p m	10	35	16,794	641
6	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	15	42	17,731	639
7	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	14	53	19,011	636
8	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	24	58	24,377	625
9	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	5	33	32,549	609
10	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	17	37	38,209	600
10	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	22	37	38,282	600
12	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	1	23	42,888	592
12	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	12	40	43,171	592
14	last again	eckeric eckeric	5	39	46,249	587
15	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	8	34	52,157	578
16	vagabonds	christopher f	20	36	60,889	565
17	Finally	Mark D	13	37	61,430	564
17	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	13	52	61,430	564
19	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	8	42	64,563	559
20	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	7	66	65,210	558
21	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	27	34	68,026	554
22	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	47	72,361	546
23	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	12	39	84,790	525
24	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	2	45	85,146	524
25	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	14	30	94,968	505
26	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	12	40	105,316	481
27	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	14	27	106,620	478
28	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	7	35	116,934	449
29	tallclay	Clay H	16	33	118,951	443
30	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	31	123,398	428

November
	Team	Manager	T	G	R	P
1	Charlton Emulators	F'd Off	3	42	12,043	209
2	Kwacky's Kwitters	richard looker	3	42	14,887	206
3	Crap City United	g s p m	1	35	17,927	203
3	Mossy Athletic	Emad Mostaque	1	53	17,927	203
5	fascist bully boys	Ufez Jones	1	66	44,158	187
6	bluebears	andy griffiths	1	37	48,537	185
7	FC Cacahuate	skronk _	4	34	55,833	182
8	vagabonds	christopher f	1	36	62,294	179
8	Bayern Mucus 03	Danny The Taupe	3	36	62,764	179
10	Blammos!	Star Unsuitable	3	24	70,178	176
11	Bosiak Bashers	joe bieda	0	37	73,310	174
12	Ardley Athletic	Squealy Neily	7	58	81,016	172
13	Rings of Saturn	David Hansen	0	33	86,450	169
14	Deadly Calm	Big Calm	3	52	91,054	168
15	The Bog Bandits	Fat Buddha	4	37	93,893	167
16	Sporting Goats	Eliot Shepard	0	47	104,896	162
17	tallclay	Clay H	3	33	109,576	161
18	last again	eckeric eckeric	1	39	122,270	156
19	Finally	Mark D	2	37	124,813	155
20	cutters	mbd1 mbd1	2	40	129,725	153
21	Nemo's Dreamers	lil nemo	0	27	130,381	152
22	37 Push Ups	Corpse R. Christ	0	23	135,166	150
23	Salmacis FC	Huw Morris	0	42	137,411	149
23	SilentInTheMorning	pful ler	0	45	137,411	149
25	AVZ Thundering Herd	usf bull	2	35	141,249	148
26	Generals F.C.	Noah Egorin	0	30	161,798	137
27	BillSaysThisSCORES!!	Bill Lazar	4	39	176,314	128
28	Terrapin Utd	Rick Scully	2	34	179,684	125
29	Trendelmaniacs	t trendel	0	31	185,800	118
30	Atlanta Untitled	Tim Truxell	4	40	193,244	108

And as a value-added bonus, here's your monthly planner for December:

Gameweek 15
Date	Home	Away
06 Dec 12:30	Newcastle	Liverpool
06 Dec 15:00	Birmingham	Blackburn
06 Dec 15:00	Fulham	Bolton
06 Dec 15:00	Leeds	Chelsea
06 Dec 15:00	Leicester	Arsenal
06 Dec 15:00	Man. United	Aston Villa
06 Dec 15:00	Middlesbrough	Portsmouth
06 Dec 15:00	Tottenham	Wolves
07 Dec 14:00	Everton	Man. City
07 Dec 16:05	Southampton	Charlton

Gameweek 16
Date	Home	Away
13 Dec 12:30	Man. United	Man. City
13 Dec 15:00	Chelsea	Bolton
13 Dec 15:00	Leicester	Birmingham
13 Dec 15:00	Liverpool	Southampton
13 Dec 15:00	Middlesbrough	Charlton
13 Dec 15:00	Newcastle	Tottenham
13 Dec 15:00	Portsmouth	Everton
14 Dec 12:00	Aston Villa	Wolves
14 Dec 14:00	Arsenal	Blackburn
14 Dec 16:05	Leeds	Fulham

Gameweek 17
Date	Home	Away
20 Dec 15:00	Birmingham	Middlesbrough
20 Dec 15:00	Blackburn	Aston Villa
20 Dec 15:00	Bolton	Arsenal
20 Dec 15:00	Charlton	Newcastle
20 Dec 15:00	Everton	Leicester
20 Dec 15:00	Fulham	Chelsea
20 Dec 15:00	Wolves	Liverpool
21 Dec 12:30	Southampton	Portsmouth
21 Dec 16:05	Tottenham	Man. United
22 Dec 20:00	Man. City	Leeds

Gameweek 18
Date	Home	Away
26 Dec 12:00	Arsenal	Wolves
26 Dec 12:00	Charlton	Chelsea
26 Dec 12:00	Fulham	Southampton
26 Dec 15:00	Birmingham	Man. City
26 Dec 15:00	Blackburn	Middlesbrough
26 Dec 15:00	Leeds	Aston Villa
26 Dec 15:00	Leicester	Newcastle
26 Dec 15:00	Liverpool	Bolton
26 Dec 15:00	Man. United	Everton
26 Dec 15:00	Portsmouth	Tottenham

Gameweek 19
Date	Home	Away
28 Dec 12:30	Chelsea	Portsmouth
28 Dec 14:00	Newcastle	Blackburn
28 Dec 15:00	Aston Villa	Fulham
28 Dec 15:00	Bolton	Leicester
28 Dec 15:00	Everton	Birmingham
28 Dec 15:00	Man. City	Liverpool
28 Dec 15:00	Tottenham	Charlton
28 Dec 15:00	Wolves	Leeds
28 Dec 16:05	Middlesbrough	Man. United
29 Dec 20:00	Southampton	Arsenal

Sort of a bad time to buy Bolton defenders, in other words. The remaining first half schedule is very friendly to United, and Liverpool have to like their odds for continuing their run. Discussion of the Yahoo EPL league is welcome in this topic, and anyone who wants to try to cut and paste source for its table can go ahead.

posted by taupe at 03:42 PM on November 30, 2003