September 07, 2006

Lions' assistant coach arrested for driving in the buff, among other things.: Giving the term "naked bootleg" a whole new meaning, Detroit Lions' assistant coach Joe Cullen has been arrested twice in the past two weeks, once for "driving on a public street without any clothes on."

posted by The_Black_Hand to football at 10:30 AM - 36 comments

Pride of Quincy, MA! Yay!

posted by jerseygirl at 10:34 AM on September 07

Guess the players can't have ALL the fun, huh?

posted by Thisguy at 10:41 AM on September 07

What is it about the NFC North? I know we live in the frozen north, and summer is but a glimmer of time each year, but first "Love Boat" and now this, perhaps the "Norris" Division should be changed to the "NoRis(que)" Division.

posted by elovrich at 10:51 AM on September 07

Oh, man.

posted by chicobangs at 11:00 AM on September 07

Eddie Griffin was riding shotgun.

posted by SummersEve at 11:22 AM on September 07

Classic line SummersEve. My hat, shirt, and pants are off to you.

posted by Mustang 71 at 11:43 AM on September 07

Maybe he was trying to get climatized for those games in Green Bay and Chicago?

posted by dbt302 at 11:43 AM on September 07

I'm sensing a little NFL hypocrisy here. If this were a player, a private treatment program would hardly be the only punishment he would be facing.

posted by bperk at 11:54 AM on September 07

He really likes you SummersEve.

posted by jerseygirl at 11:54 AM on September 07

Only the Lions... bperk, Where is this treatment center for nude drivers you speak of?

posted by gradys_kitchen at 12:17 PM on September 07

He should be happy this didn't happen in San Diego......

posted by skydivedad at 12:20 PM on September 07

It's against the law to drive naked!?! Damn, I'd better cut it out.

posted by commander cody at 12:32 PM on September 07

The least he could've done was strap a sock on his johnson like Flea from Red Hot Chilli Peppers. Then he could've just said that it was a fashion statement.

posted by BornIcon at 12:40 PM on September 07

Where is this treatment center for nude drivers you speak of? It's called rehab. Some folks can't handle their liquor.

posted by bperk at 01:06 PM on September 07

If you want to be invited to Fred Smoot's next party, you should ask first, Joe - then you can practice.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 01:10 PM on September 07

So when will they start drug testing the coaches?

posted by T.C. at 01:26 PM on September 07

He was just on his way over to Jon 3:16 Kitna's house for a baptism.

posted by LostInDaJungle at 04:13 PM on September 07

So when will they start drug testing the coaches? Matt Millen ought to thank his lucky stars that they haven't started testing on GM's, because he must be doing some kind of drugs with the personnel moves he makes (and no I don't have a scientific study to back that up).

posted by commander cody at 04:33 PM on September 07

Um...He was trying to symbolize the rebirth of the Detroit Lions franchise...getting nekked like a newborn

posted by wingnut4life at 04:39 PM on September 07

Hmmm...a (Honolulu) blue streak, as it were.

posted by ctal1999 at 07:06 PM on September 07

Think something like this get listed on a Carfax report?

posted by SummersEve at 07:18 PM on September 07

Matt Millen does reveal a lot about himself on his myspace page.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 07:25 PM on September 07

Think something like this get listed on a Carfax report? Depends: cloth seats? Alternatively: Depends. Cloth seats.

posted by yerfatma at 07:32 PM on September 07

Detroit Lions assistant coach Joe Cullen has encountered legal trouble for, among other things, allegedly driving without clothes. One more reason not to play for the Detroit Lions.... but i'm sure the team was fired up after that one...

posted by Kendall at 07:57 PM on September 07

How about that! A professional sports figure with NOTHING to hide...

posted by wolfdad at 08:44 PM on September 07

L aughable I nept O verpaid N aked S issies

posted by ledzep77 at 09:32 PM on September 07

How irresponsible of Cullen. Some coaches just don't understand that whether they want to be or not, they are role models for their players and they set the standards for the players behavior. Cullen has to realize how stupid and objectionable his antics are, I mean come on man, ordering fried french fries and a hamburger during the season! That sort of eating habit belongs in the off-season. I bet his drink wasn't even diet!

posted by mcgriff67 at 07:18 AM on September 08

Seriously, how, at the next meeting of the defensive line that he presides over, can the players not practically bust a gut laughing?

posted by mjkredliner at 11:15 AM on September 08

Forget the D-line, how about anyone in the entire free world. The next time Cullen is done being intimate with his girlfriend/boyfriend and he asks her/him," Was it good for you?" how can she/he not respond by saying "You should have biggie sized it". He should quit now and move to Nepal and save himself a lifetime worth of grief.

posted by mcgriff67 at 04:08 PM on September 08

A message to Joe Cullen, paraphrasing Dean Wormer: "Fat, Drunk and Naked is no way to go through life, son". ps. FIRE MILLEN!

posted by ledzep77 at 04:27 PM on September 08

leave the man alone, he's only having a little fun.

posted by anndebra at 05:06 PM on September 08


posted by MICHIGANDER at 01:50 AM on September 09

Dear God, I think we've all agreed on something. Sort of.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 10:36 AM on September 09

You mean im the only guy here who enjoys the feeling of freedom you get crusing around town butt naked with the top down so you can feel the wind in, hair.

posted by Folkways at 01:22 PM on September 09

Im pretty sure you are.... but theres this other guy on here- like redsoxr... or something like that who loves to drive around naked....

posted by Kendall at 06:12 PM on September 09

Just kidding! ; )

posted by Kendall at 06:14 PM on September 09

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