12/24/24
September 25, 2009
Chicago Bears Players Fined for Flatulence: Chicago Bears players have instituted a $20 fine for passing gas during team meetings. "Mark Anderson might be the worst ever," teammate Anthony Adams writes on his blog. "He takes these protein shakes, so he smells like little babies do."
As long as they don't fine players for gay sex. That would be overkill.
posted by afl-aba at 03:47 PM on September 25, 2009
So, Mark Anderson's farts smells like little babies? What's the problem with that? It would be an issue if they smelled like baby poop.
I played HS ball with a guy name Demond who could break wind at will. That was great in pile-ups.
posted by wfrazerjr at 04:20 PM on September 25, 2009
And here I thought Bears only farted in the woods. Besides, the Cowboys are the most infamous when it comes to furious flatulance.
posted by irunfromclones at 06:06 PM on September 25, 2009
Man, if my employer fined for squeakers, I'd be one broke little monkey (probably the protein shakes).
posted by tahoemoj at 06:10 PM on September 25, 2009
As long as they don't fine players for gay sex. That would be overkill.
Say what? Come again?
posted by THX-1138 at 07:39 PM on September 25, 2009
I love this sort of breaking news story.
posted by Joey Michaels at 08:46 PM on September 25, 2009
I'm entering a 5K race to benefit a scholarship fund tomorrow morning. I tanked up big time on arepas and black beans tonight.
If I get out to an early lead in the race, I dare the other guys in the men over 55 division to come get me.
posted by beaverboard at 09:37 PM on September 25, 2009
That's a gas! :D
posted by Joey Michaels at 10:09 PM on September 25, 2009
The fact that passing gas made the news, blog, whatever...is a clear indication that the gas that is passed in these meeting is indeed offensive. Thats just gross...
posted by StarFucker at 12:58 AM on September 26, 2009
Well...I just think this whole thread stinks...
posted by wildbill1 at 05:49 AM on September 26, 2009
I don't think one would want to point the finger at Mark Anderson.
He might pull it.
(rim shot)
posted by bobfoot at 07:06 AM on September 26, 2009
bobfoot, I'm glad you let that joke rip.
posted by Joey Michaels at 08:33 AM on September 26, 2009
Well, Chicago is the Windy City, after all.
posted by Howard_T at 11:08 AM on September 26, 2009
So are the fines based on volume, length or severity?
posted by BoKnows at 12:34 PM on September 26, 2009
If farting was all it took to make the Bears' roster I would be starting and up for All Pro. Ask my wife.
posted by billsaysthis at 01:15 PM on September 26, 2009
Great. More good news for Sundays game.