September 05, 2006

Legendary baseball player admits to steroids.:
It's sad when players you followed for years come out and admit they were on the juice. As one official puts it "Wah-wah-wah-wawa-wah."

posted by grum@work to baseball at 04:19 PM - 34 comments

It disturbed me that I actually saw that episode playing out in my head as I read it.

posted by timdawg at 04:23 PM on September 05

Such a shame, the one baseball player I really looked up to now comes out with this. It really shows how deeply steroids has become involved with baseball.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 04:24 PM on September 05

What sort of role model can Charlie be to Rerun now?

posted by scully at 04:27 PM on September 05

It disturbed me that I actually saw that episode playing out in my head as I read it True indeed timdawg

posted by BornIcon at 04:35 PM on September 05

Charlie Brown on roids!?! I'll believe that when Tom Cruise apologizes to Brooke Shields.

posted by irunfromclones at 05:02 PM on September 05

I'll believe when Cruise comes out of the closet.

posted by commander cody at 05:12 PM on September 05

Joe Shlabotnik was clean. This I am sure of.

posted by Joey Michaels at 06:06 PM on September 05

Of course if he was juicing, one has to wonder how far he might have kicked that football had Lucy ever held it still, and why he never went into a roid rage when she pulled it away. Or when the little red~headed girl didn`t send him a valentine. Or the umpteenth time his dog embarrassed him by being so weird. Hell, we may have just stopped another Columbine. I can hear Linus as he drags his blanket full of ammo, "I don`t know Charlie Brown. You realize the police have guns too, right?" and Charlie Brown with a Rambo headband replying, "Shut up, blanket boy. It`s go time".

posted by gradioc at 06:37 PM on September 05

How can Charlie possibly afford to pay for performance enhancing drugs? After all, we all know that he and his teammates play for peanuts...

posted by judgedread at 07:55 PM on September 05

OUCH! That one actually hurt Judge!

posted by commander cody at 07:59 PM on September 05

I think Charlie had to try something. We all know Snoopy is one shady character. That woodstock, well, he just can't be trusted. Charlie has gone a lot of years without throwing a strike. He got caught and admitted it, unlike some other baseball player that we all know about, hell, he lies to the grand jury.

posted by Psycho at 08:28 PM on September 05

What sort of role model can Charlie be to Rerun now? well, i think that's an issue that the van pelts need to deal with. especially since it seems that his brother linus is a greenie pusher.

posted by goddam at 08:34 PM on September 05

!!! !!!!!!!! !!! !!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!! !!! !!!!! !!!!! !?

posted by Ufez Jones at 08:48 PM on September 05

Take me out to the ball game, take me out with the crowd, buy me some PEANUTS and Cracker Jack, I don't care if I never get back.......(all right, I'll stop. But I want the wrongful persecution of an American icon to stop also.)

posted by judgedread at 08:48 PM on September 05

If I counted on a team "loaded" with the likes of Lucy (probably a clubhouse lawyer), Snoopy (who always seems to "dog it") and Pigpen, who loses EVERYTHING in the dirt, I'd be shooting, too! Man, gettin' right with the little red haired girl...Yo, Yo, Yo!!!

posted by wolfdad at 08:52 PM on September 05

gradioc, just so you know, you've gotta watch what you say. I dont personally, but people on here may have had people hurt or killed in Columbine, and speaking of it like that may offend some people. Not trying to be a spoil-sport or anything, just want you to make sure you understand who may be offended deeply by that

posted by zachaweenus at 09:31 PM on September 05

You know wolfdad I hadn't thought of that. Juicing up for the game is one thing, but getting the body that brings in that little red head fox he is always sniffing after would be the bonus before getting caught,

posted by Psycho at 09:42 PM on September 05

What zachaweenus said.

posted by tommytrump at 09:48 PM on September 05

Can we be sure that this hasn't invaded hockey as well? I think it's all about Snoopy, he's the only one that plays all the sports!

posted by dviking at 11:10 PM on September 05

This All makes me wonder... were the rumors about Charlie Brown and Peppermint Patty true? It is not inconceivable as she did fall on hard times and overcompensated for her tomboyish upbringing and became a porn star doing several well known collaborations with Doraemon and even a lesbian scence with Hello Kitty. She eventually left porn and now manages a semi pro softball team to support her crack habit.

posted by rudean77 at 12:45 AM on September 06

Kudos to Joey, judge and Ufez.... Very funny comments, gents. I had forgotten Joe Shlabotnik, thanks for jogging my memory.

posted by mjkredliner at 07:39 AM on September 06

Peppermint Patty is as queer as a three dollar bill - and you know this, man. Since the mousy one calls her 'sir' I can only assume PP's a top. It would really help Brown's cause if he was even remotely funny once in a while. Side note: If you take out Garfield's imagined dialogue it's a comic strip about a desperately lonely Jon Arbuckle talking to his cat. Sad.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 07:59 AM on September 06

Very cute. I was sahking my head the whole time in ageement. Thanks fot the post.

posted by daddisamm at 08:24 AM on September 06

That was good stuff. It was missing a GOOD GRIEF! though.

posted by gspm at 09:04 AM on September 06

Fun to read. Cleverly written parody. Great post. Thanks.

posted by T$PORT4lawschool at 09:05 AM on September 06

You know, I think Marcie is the snitch in the whole conspiracy. Patty wanted wanted revenge on Charlie for not taking her advances. All of them were in on the consricy against our hero. I here it was Lucy's idea, with Woodstock getting the goods. All put together by pigpen because no-one could see what he was doing through that dust cloud. Of course Charlie and and Shoopy having such trust, Charlie took whatever Snoopy gave him. I have some inside information that his brother, Spike, will be coming in from Needles California as a character witness. His other brothers and sisters from the Daisy Hill puppy farm are all up in arms over this. This is all a conspiracy. Charlie is going to roll as a prosecution witness and roll on the whole gang and bring them down.

posted by Psycho at 09:40 AM on September 06

Charlie Brown on roids!?! Com'n look at the size of that mellon. It's as if his neck shouldn't be able to support his roid inflated noggin. And what of the premature hair loss? How could we have been so blind?!?

posted by gradys_kitchen at 09:54 AM on September 06

I don't think Lucy had anything to do with the steroids. She was too busy operating the gambling ring. Did you really think her psychiatric stand was a legitimate business? Rumor has it she was in cahoots with a person using the alias, The Great Pumpkin. There's more to it, but I've probably said too much already.

posted by MrFrisby at 10:12 AM on September 06

Charlie Brown is a robot.

posted by Bill Lumbergh at 11:59 AM on September 06

Charlie Brown is a robot. No no no no. Tiger Woods is a robot.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 02:15 PM on September 06

irunfromclones: Charlie Brown on roids!?! I'll believe that when Tom Cruise apologizes to Brooke Shields. Uh Oh.

posted by Joey Michaels at 04:49 PM on September 06

I'm a robot.

posted by commander cody at 07:40 PM on September 06

GOOD GRIEF!!! (That was for you, GSPM) By the way, Charlie Brown... Barry Bonds called...he wants to "befriend" the little red-headed girl...

posted by wolfdad at 09:12 PM on September 06

Now I know why the strip was called "PEANUTS"

posted by thatch at 10:09 PM on September 06

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