August 15, 2010

49ers Running Back Quits NFL for Christ: San Francisco 49ers running back Glen Coffee, a third-round pick last year, has abruptly retired from football. "[W]hen I look back I feel I never should have entered the draft in the first place," Coffee said. "Football was no longer my dream. I found Christ in college. ... He told me a long time ago to walk away from the game."

posted by rcade to football at 01:44 PM - 38 comments

His decision to make, so I don't fault him for that.

Just hard to understand why playing football and being religious and/or going back to school would have been so hard to reconcile. Plenty of players are very religious and plenty are finishing their degrees (I assume that there are at least a few involved with both).

posted by dviking at 02:47 PM on August 15, 2010

Maybe he wants to live past his fifties.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 06:51 PM on August 15, 2010

Hey, good for him. It's very rare that people have the yarbles to drop a stable thing to follow what makes them happy or what the feel they must do even though there there be dragons that way.

posted by NoMich at 07:35 PM on August 15, 2010

Jesus has a Fantasy League team

posted by bobfoot at 12:35 AM on August 16, 2010

Hard to imagine that a football player could do anything but play football, is there?

posted by irunfromclones at 04:34 AM on August 16, 2010

I called Glen Coffee at his Los Gatos apartment at 8:30 this morning. When I told him who I was, he said he was told not to talk to the media.

Told by who, I wonder?

posted by lil_brown_bat at 09:10 AM on August 16, 2010

On the downside, he may never get to thank God in a postgame interview.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 09:49 AM on August 16, 2010

If he ends up missing the game, he could probably go help Tony Dungy.

posted by beaverboard at 10:42 AM on August 16, 2010

Singletary is a pretty devout Christian himself, so it would have been pretty interesting to be in on that meeting. Kudos for Coffee. If you're going to preach it, it's nice to see you walk it.

posted by pholcomb at 10:42 AM on August 16, 2010

Jesus told him to walk away from the game a long time ago?

I think anybody who thinks Jesus is talking to him has bigger problems than career choices.

Of all the things Jesus should be concerned with.....where does he find the time?

posted by Atheist at 12:09 PM on August 16, 2010

Of all the things Jesus should be concerned with.....where does he find the time?

IIRC it's a central belief for most Christians that God (or Jesus) gives people guidance about how to live their lives. When Christians say that Jesus "told" them something, some no doubt mean it quite literally, while others merely mean that that's where they got the clue. Within the context of the belief in a caring god, it's not far-fetched at all.

posted by lil_brown_bat at 12:39 PM on August 16, 2010

Jesus has a Fantasy League team

Jesus' Fantasy League team name is Tim Tebow.

I think anybody who thinks Jesus is talking to him has bigger problems than career choices

You telling me that it wasn't Jesus telling me to go out and buy a year supply of Poly O's string cheese at BJ's?

Dammit!!

posted by BornIcon at 02:14 PM on August 16, 2010

"Stop masturbating, Kent!"

posted by yerfatma at 03:17 PM on August 16, 2010

No, BI, that was him - strange sense of humor sometimes, the apostles had trouble keeping up too.

posted by kokaku at 03:20 PM on August 16, 2010

Of all the things Jesus should be concerned with.....where does he find the time?

He helps decide sporting events all the time. Dude is everywhere.

Honestly, my opinion on the likelihood of a man in the clouds giving instructions to him on career choices aside, it really is a great ploy. It's going to take balls to criticize a guy when he claims Jesus told him to do it.

Could have used that angle a few times in my life.

posted by justgary at 04:06 PM on August 16, 2010

BI - I wouldn't tell anybody it wasn't Jesus telling them to buy string cheese or anything else for that matter. Although I seriously doubt Jesus is talking to anybody about anything, I have no doubt some people believe they are hearing it.

I suppose it would be really funny if at some point upon his inevitable meeting with Jesus, Glen Coffee is remorse when Jesus says the following: " I said stop praying not stop playing"

posted by Atheist at 04:07 PM on August 16, 2010

"Stop masturbating, Kent!"

Holy shit, Real Genius? Awesome.

posted by tahoemoj at 04:44 PM on August 16, 2010

It is God!

posted by wfrazerjr at 05:01 PM on August 16, 2010

Ok Coffee, I want you to suck the cancer outta my wife and spit it out like a bunch of tiny bees.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 06:15 PM on August 16, 2010

"Stop masturbating, Kent!"

I believe the line was "stop playing with yourself," but awesome reference nonetheless...

Ok Coffee, I want you to suck the cancer outta my wife and spit it out like a bunch of tiny bees.

Dude, he said his name was like the drink, only not spelt the same. This isn't the tree you wanna bark up to cure your wife...

posted by MeatSaber at 07:55 PM on August 16, 2010

I've always wondered...if the pitcher is wearing a cross, and points to the heavens when he takes the mound, and the batter is wearing a cross, and "crosses" himself before stepping into the box...who does God help?

Anyway, I just think that football and religion ought to be able to coexist in a man's life...especially if football could bring him millions which he could then use to help his church.

It appears my movie/TV viewing is lacking as I have no idea where the quote some of you are referring to comes from.

posted by dviking at 12:37 AM on August 17, 2010

I've always wondered...if the pitcher is wearing a cross, and points to the heavens when he takes the mound, and the batter is wearing a cross, and "crosses" himself before stepping into the box...who does God help?

The Yankees?

posted by owlhouse at 12:58 AM on August 17, 2010

The Yankees?

As a voice intones from on high: "Ballgame over! Yankees win! Theeeeeee YANKEES WIN!"

posted by lil_brown_bat at 09:10 AM on August 17, 2010

The Yankees?

The Angels.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 09:37 AM on August 17, 2010

I always wonder about the boxers that cross themselves before the fight. Does Jesus actually help them beat the crap out of their opponent?

posted by Atheist at 10:46 AM on August 17, 2010

I always wonder about the boxers that cross themselves before the fight. Does Jesus actually help them beat the crap out of their opponent?

Always seemed to work for Rocky.

posted by BornIcon at 10:46 AM on August 17, 2010

It appears my movie/TV viewing is lacking as I have no idea where the quote some of you are referring to comes from.

It's simple. The world is made up of two types of people...those who have seen the classic that is Real Genius, and those I'd just as soon not have to deal with...

posted by MeatSaber at 11:04 AM on August 17, 2010

The world is made up of two types of people...those who have seen the classic that is Real Genius

Ahhhh, Real Genius. When Val Kilmer was actually a good actor not including Heat.

posted by BornIcon at 11:31 AM on August 17, 2010

When Val Kilmer was actually a good actor not including Heat.

Not to derail this very focused thread, but I posit, sir for your consideration the brilliance of Tombstone. You're no daisy. You're no daisy at all.

posted by tahoemoj at 11:58 AM on August 17, 2010

Not to derail this very focused thread, but I posit, sir for your consideration the brilliance of Tombstone.

Unfortunately, this thread was derailed as soon as Jesus joined up a Fantasy Football league.

Tombstone was ok but I like Wyatt Earp better. Dennis Quaid's portrayal of Doc Holliday was better than Kilmer's version IMHO.

posted by BornIcon at 12:39 PM on August 17, 2010

Val Kilmer's a fine actor, just happens to be the world's biggest prick (apparently). You have to include "Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang" as a good performance, IMHO.

posted by yerfatma at 12:42 PM on August 17, 2010

Dammit! Forgot about that one. Good catch fatty. I was trying to get The Saint out of my memory bank.

posted by BornIcon at 01:47 PM on August 17, 2010

Yeah, there's a whole list of crappy movies he's done-- something about fighting lions in Africa with Michael Douglas-- did I dream that?

posted by yerfatma at 03:01 PM on August 17, 2010

Don't you mean nightmare? That piece of garbage is called The Ghost and the Darkness. I still wake up in a cold sweat considering I actually saw that shit.

Damn you Val Kilmer! Damn you straight to hell!!

posted by BornIcon at 03:19 PM on August 17, 2010

I wasted far too much time looking at Kilmer's IMDB page. Unimpressive to say the least.

posted by bperk at 03:56 PM on August 17, 2010

I wasted far too much time looking at Kilmer's IMDB page.

I wasted way too much time watching Kilmer's movies. Fuck it, now I need a drink!

posted by BornIcon at 04:13 PM on August 17, 2010

And, on slow days, perhaps the Padres. Now, my hazy recollection of the conversation between Kent and God in Real Genius...

"And Kent...stop touching yourself!"

"Gasp...it IS you!"

Then again, I was probably pretty stoned at the time.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 12:56 AM on August 18, 2010

I'm your huckleberry...

posted by The_Black_Hand at 01:12 AM on August 18, 2010

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