11/21/24
May 17, 2007
Why Cyclists Really Shave Their Legs: The cycling columnist for The Guardian has something to get off his chest today about his silky-smooth shaven legs: Cyclists don't do it for aerodynamic reasons. "Experts may try to tell you instead that smooth legs are worth a couple of seconds a kilometre, so this male depilation can mean the margin between victory and defeat," Matt Seaton writes. "But if this were true, we would all be shaving our forearms. And perhaps our eyebrows, too. ... we shave our legs because we think it looks good."
Hmm, dubious. Cyclists shave their legs because they get massages every day. Naturally, a cycling masseur doesn't massage their arms as vigorously as he does their legs.
posted by afx237vi at 10:53 AM on May 17, 2007
Cyclists shave their legs because they get massages every day. Naturally, a cycling masseur doesn't massage their arms as vigorously as he does their legs. And that's why I shave my scrotum. LOL.
posted by worldcup2002 at 11:42 AM on May 17, 2007
Cyclists shave their legs because they get massages every day. Naturally, a cycling masseur doesn't massage their arms as vigorously as he does their legs. That's called the ol' Rub & Tug Happy Ending.
posted by BornIcon at 11:52 AM on May 17, 2007
posted by Skot at 12:20 PM on May 17, 2007
I hate when style and fashion invade sports. It's like the current crop of eye black stickers that aren't even black or have writing on them. Pointless. There is an outstanding saying that Porsche uses (I have no idea on spelling) Foomsprocken that means Form Follows Function.
posted by timdawg at 01:03 PM on May 17, 2007
Cyclists shave their legs because they get massages every day. That's it! I'm quitting my job and becoming a cyclist! Bring on the Swedish female cycling massage team!
posted by THX-1138 at 02:31 PM on May 17, 2007
actually, cyclists shave their legs so that, in the event of a crash, the wounds will be much easier to clean.
posted by sr1066 at 04:10 PM on May 17, 2007
I thought it was to be more aerodynamic.
posted by BornIcon at 04:12 PM on May 17, 2007
Dude, check the post. You don't even have to read the link.
posted by yerfatma at 04:37 PM on May 17, 2007
they do it so the hair doesn't get stuck in the chain. Same with the balls.
posted by TAZ29 at 04:50 PM on May 17, 2007
Hold on a sec. And I originally thought it was to be more aerodynamic. There ya go. That's how it sounded in my head before I actually wrote it. Oops. I always thought that was the reason why cyclists shaved their legs.
posted by BornIcon at 04:57 PM on May 17, 2007
I always knew something was up with that shit. How fucking much wind can some little leg hairs pick up? I guess if you're a sasquatch you could say that it makes you overheat or something, but come on now. By the way, those razor bumps and cuts ain't so appealing. I want my $6.50 refunded for the Turkey Bacon Guacamole sandwich I just tasted, twice.
posted by yay-yo at 06:16 PM on May 17, 2007
I want my $6.50 refunded for the Turkey Bacon Guacamole sandwich I just tasted, twice. Ewww...Turkey, Bacon, Guacamole? Maybe you shouldn't have gotten that in the first place. But go for it.
posted by BornIcon at 06:29 PM on May 17, 2007
BI, you just wouldn't understand. You're from Jersey, I'm from Cali. Two completely different worlds. But I do reccomend it, as long as you don't stumble upon some hidden, internet, fetish-porn after you eat it.
posted by yay-yo at 06:43 PM on May 17, 2007
I'm going with the multiple cause theory. I have picked gravel out of leg scrapes many times, but have so far not experienced the joy of a good leg massage from a personal trainer. But they both sound convincing.
posted by owlhouse at 08:07 PM on May 17, 2007
I knew a bike racer who swore up and down it was to prevent horrible ingrown hairs in the event of a crash/rash. He told nasty stories about foot-long ingrown hairs. But then, he talked a lot of bullshit.
posted by lil_brown_bat at 09:08 PM on May 17, 2007
foot-long ingrown hairs Do they have a category for those in the Guiness Book of World Records?
posted by yay-yo at 09:20 PM on May 17, 2007
I once got my left testicle caught in the rear derailer, boy did THAT hurt!!! Then, when it finally broke loose, it snapped up, hit me in the back of the head, and knocked my helmet and my sunglasses off. Boy did THAT hurt!
posted by MGDADDYO at 11:04 PM on May 17, 2007
I once got my left testicle caught in the rear derailer, boy did THAT hurt!!! Then, when it finally broke loose, it snapped up, hit me in the back of the head, and knocked my helmet and my sunglasses off. Boy did THAT hurt! I'm wondering what broke loose, your left testicle, or the derailer?
posted by tommybiden at 11:12 PM on May 17, 2007
Shaving the legs isnt necessary, but it is a necessity to shave your back. The hairs tickle my back when they flap around on fast breaks
posted by deafoh at 12:42 AM on May 18, 2007
Shaving the legs isnt necessary, but it is a necessity to shave your back If you're a damn Woolly Mammoth I could totally understand then.
posted by BornIcon at 04:28 AM on May 18, 2007
I once got my left testicle caught in the rear derailer There used to be a mountain bike website called 'Exploded Scrotum'. I can't google it right now 'cos I'm in an airport lounge. Let me know what you find.
posted by owlhouse at 07:18 AM on May 18, 2007
I always knew something was up with that shit. How fucking much wind can some little leg hairs pick up? I don't know man. Whenever I bike my legs pick up a new hair style, and once I got some hair stuck in the chain. Then the handle bars twisted, I slid off the seat and landed on the bar dick and tail-bone first, then my left leg twisted over the right side, as I fell of the bike sideways my right ankle got cought in the pedle strap and tore my achilleas tendon. All happend goin about 30 mph. Boy did THAT hurt. Aftermath: Torn ankle tendon, bruised tail-bone, bruised thigh, and questionable for kids. Not as bad as the nut cracker with the derailer though.
posted by TelamarketersBeware at 07:54 AM on May 18, 2007
I don't know man. Whenever I bike my legs pick up a new hair style, and once I got some hair stuck in the chain. Then the handle bars twisted, I slid off the seat and landed on the bar dick and tail-bone first, then my left leg twisted over the right side, as I fell of the bike sideways my right ankle got cought in the pedle strap and tore my achilleas tendon. All happend goin about 30 mph. Boy did THAT hurt. So much for the saying: "It's just like riding a bike."
posted by yay-yo at 08:47 AM on May 18, 2007
It's only May, so I know there will be other entries, but I want to nominate MGDADDYD for best first comment of 2007.
posted by lil_brown_bat at 09:28 AM on May 18, 2007
I once got my left testicle caught in the rear derailer, boy did THAT hurt!!! Then, when it finally broke loose, it snapped up, hit me in the back of the head, and knocked my helmet and my sunglasses off. Boy did THAT hurt! Hi. Nice to meet you. So anyway, your testicle hit you in the head?
posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 11:06 AM on May 18, 2007
Yes it did hit me in the head, Then, when I went home I sprayed carburetor cleaner on my nut sac to get the grease cleaned off and it burned like hell because when I shaved my legs, I got carried away with the razor and kept going all the way to the holy land. LOOORD HAVE MERCY!!!
posted by MGDADDYO at 11:48 AM on May 18, 2007
Wow.
posted by TelamarketersBeware at 11:50 AM on May 18, 2007
Yes it did hit me in the head, Then, when I went home I sprayed carburetor cleaner on my nut sac to get the grease cleaned off and it burned like hell because when I shaved my legs, I got carried away with the razor and kept going all the way to the holy land. LOOORD HAVE MERCY!!! If ever there was a case of TMI...
posted by yay-yo at 12:30 PM on May 18, 2007
Yet I find myself eagerly awaiting the next installment of "As MGDADDYO's torn, flappy nustack turns in the spokes."
posted by tahoemoj at 01:51 PM on May 18, 2007
If they were really serious about it, they would have it removed with lasers or something.
posted by drezdn at 01:53 PM on May 18, 2007
Yet I find myself eagerly awaiting the next installment of "As MGDADDYO's torn, flappy nustack turns in the spokes." For the first time in my life, I'm at a loss for words. .
posted by BornIcon at 01:54 PM on May 18, 2007
MGDADDYO: Perhaps tighter britches are in order (easy, yay-yo) Or one of those chain guard dealies (would that have worked?) Maybe bikings just not for you. But if you must, I would suggest bringing a topical creme.
posted by THX-1138 at 04:20 PM on May 18, 2007
Or a cast-iron cup.
posted by The_Black_Hand at 05:15 PM on May 18, 2007
Best thread derail ever. I busted a nut laughing.
posted by rcade at 07:05 PM on May 18, 2007
It's only May, so I know there will be other entries, but I want to nominate MGDADDYD for best first comment of 2007. I will second that.
posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 07:49 PM on May 18, 2007
It's only May, so I know there will be other entries, but I want to nominate MGDADDYD for best first comment of 2007. I third that. Best first impression you can ever make in my book.
posted by TelamarketersBeware at 08:35 PM on May 18, 2007
I'm suspicious that MGDADDYO might have been sitting on the bike backwards to get his left testicle caught in the rear derailer which is on the right side of the bike. EVERYBODY knows you shouldn't ride backwards, it requires shaving your back. Which is hard to reach.
posted by 1959Giants at 04:06 PM on May 19, 2007
I wasn't riding backwards, but on time, someone told me to put a potato in my pants to look more endowed and I put it in the back instead of the front. I don't know if I'm going to be able to hang out at this site much longer, you guys spend too much time getting off the beaten path instead of sticking to talking about sports.
posted by MGDADDYO at 09:27 PM on May 19, 2007
"There's nothing like a freshly shorn scrotum. It's really quite breathtaking."