September 28, 2006

The Hoserís NFL Picks, Week Four: NFL Picks that miss Jerry Glanville desperately.

posted by justgary to football at 04:21 PM - 27 comments

If the Texans do beat the Dolphins, I'll drive by your house and shoot out your porch light every Christmas Eve until the day I die.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 04:51 PM on September 28

You hit the New England thing right on the head. For instance, I no longer have repressed homosexual feelings for Tom Brady.

posted by mick at 05:54 PM on September 28

What makes you think the Raiders will score so many points--in the whole season?

posted by billsaysthis at 05:57 PM on September 28

The Vikings are actually *at* Buffalo, though I agree with the result. Entertaining as always.

posted by TheQatarian at 06:51 PM on September 28

Thanks, Q -- Pantheon, can you make that edit? And TBH, if that happens, come on in after you finish. I make a mean Prestone-and-peyote egg nog.

posted by wfrazerjr at 07:06 PM on September 28

Im tired of living on the west coast.every week its San Fran or Oakland that i get to watch..PUT ON SOME REAL GAMES

posted by dallas775 at 08:03 AM on September 29

I hate to tell you dallas, but have you forgotten that San Fran actually has the 4th ranked offense in the NFL right now? They could easily be 3-0 right now, and then you wouldn't be saying that (If San Francisco didn't have that first fumble deep in their own territory against Arizona, thats 7 less points from Arizona and some more points for San Fran most likely, either 3 or 7, which would mean San Fran wins. If they didnt have the fumble returned for a touchdown last week, thats a 14 point swing, which would bring the score to 31-31, meaning OT.). So don't forget that San Fran is starting to be a better team, as long as their defense can come around.

posted by zachaweenus at 08:40 AM on September 29

I hate to tell you dallas No you don't.

posted by lil_brown_bat at 09:04 AM on September 29

excuse me zachaweenus, if my aunt had balls she'd be my uncle! You're right about the 49ers being a better team. Very easy to get better when you're the worst team in the league 2 years running.

posted by frankiem at 09:10 AM on September 29

If the Texans do beat the Dolphins, I'll drive by your house and shoot out your porch light every Christmas Eve until the day I die. With Culpepper running the show and throwing strikes, how could they possibly lose?

posted by dyams at 09:49 AM on September 29

He hasn't had a good start for sure, but we've got this fantastic kid waiting in the wings - a former fourth-placed Heisman trophy candidate no less! He's going to be great! Exclamation marks!

posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:56 AM on September 29

Every week I only really pay attention to the Lions score. If fraze is choosing their opponet I know that he still has his sanity.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 10:34 AM on September 29

Picking against the Lions proves your sane? I hope that's not the test they use in asylums to decide if an individual is appropriate for release into society.

posted by dyams at 11:12 AM on September 29

I think this means Roy Williams is the only insane person in the world. Well, maybe him and Matt Millen.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 11:21 AM on September 29

Roy Williams' pick (guarantee) WAS insane. As for Millen, that train left the station long, long ago.

posted by dyams at 11:40 AM on September 29

Another week that the seahawks defense is under rated. I wouldn't be giving Chicago 24 points. "Bears defensive coordinater salivating"? The four wide out package for Seattle is gonna pick on that blitz package. Hasslebeck finally has quick release options. They won't be missing Alexander all that much.

posted by ptownfootball at 11:55 AM on September 29

Thank you, thank you, thank you for picking the Bears! Yours is a trusted source of informed sports knowledge!! (pops open a Rainier and tosses another salmon on the grill)

posted by THX-1138 at 12:59 PM on September 29

TBH, looks like you're going to be spending a lot of Christmas Eves in Canada. Fourth quarter, Houston handling Miami, Culpepper stinks (like the entire Dolphins team, evidentally).

posted by dyams at 02:25 PM on October 01

Ha! Black Hand, I thought about that "breaking the window on every Chrismas Eve" comment the moment I heard that score. :D

posted by Bronc Gal at 09:44 PM on October 01

How far is it from Northern Indiana to Ontario?

posted by Mr Bismarck at 02:44 AM on October 02

Yo Fraze...stock up on light bulbs and Prestone, homie! Jesus, what is up with that piss-poor offense? At this rate, by the time they build a decent offensive line, Culpepper, Chambers and Ronnie Brown will be retired! It's gonna be a long, long year.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 02:58 PM on October 02

The first order of business for Miami is get rid of Mike Mularkey. He's a joke and overrated as a coach and/or offensive mind. Second, Culpepper's not good. He peaked a few years back and it's all downhill from here. I honestly can't think of a quarterback I've seen in the NFL in several years who could perform as badly as him with the decent weapons he has. Piss poor.

posted by dyams at 05:01 PM on October 02

He's a joke and overrated as a coach and/or offensive mind. There is an offensive co-ordinator in Cleveland you can have. We will give him to you.

posted by jojomfd1 at 05:04 PM on October 02

"Thank you, thank you, thank you for picking the Bears!" "(pops open a Rainier and tosses another salmon on the grill)" How's that beer and salmon tasting now? That's what you call a complete a_ _ whooping.

posted by skydivedad at 05:14 PM on October 02

Here in Detroit we wouldn't mind giving you Matt Millen, Rob Marenelli, and of course Mr. Ford.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 05:44 PM on October 02

This week it wasn't Culpepper's fault though. What about Marty Booker droping a pass that would have left an extra minute on the clock. What about Chambers coming out because of cramps on what was one of the more important plays of that drive. What about the D giving up 17 points to the Texans. What about Ronnie Brown only getting 44 yards on the ground. Too many things went wrong to point it a Daunte and too many things went wrong so you can point at Mularkey.

posted by kidrayter2005 at 07:50 PM on October 02

7-7 ATS, 11-3 SU. 0-1 LOTW, 0-1 Trifecta. Ugh.

posted by wfrazerjr at 08:30 AM on October 03

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