04/24/24
March 03, 2005
FLOGGIN THE DOLPHIN: and 1,120 other naughty words you can't get on your jersey from the NFL shop. ("Gay" is OK.) [via Wonkette]
posted by kirkaracha to culture at 02:14 AM - 16 comments
Nice list of words. I think those are all of the words that I learned in Spanish growing up.
posted by mayerkyl at 06:26 AM on March 03, 2005
The first time i'd read that list and Gay was on it I wondered why. I mean it is a surname. I guess they wised up. and just 'cause, yourallgay.
posted by gspm at 06:52 AM on March 03, 2005
That's a shame, because just this Christmas I was planning purchase new PUSSYPOUNDER Rams unis for my whole family. It also knocks out my variation of the HE HATES ME jersey I had hoped to give my wife -- SHE FELLATES ME. I used to be a district manager for a sports apparel company, and in Detroit when the Wings first started stocking up on Russian imports, we had a run on vaguely dirty Russian names. I remember Cutcherkokov and I. Beatov being very popular for a few months until the word came down from on high to knock it ov, err, off.
posted by wfrazerjr at 07:16 AM on March 03, 2005
I take it that your wife doesn't read your SportsFilter comments, wfrazerjr?
posted by rcade at 08:16 AM on March 03, 2005
ASS PUPPIES! Some FUCK MONKEY already tried to put GAYMUTHAFUCKINWHORE on his jersey and now there is NO FUCKING WAY those SHITFUCKERS are gonna let me use DICK FOR BRAINS on mine. DO ME, you DUMB BITCHES.
posted by 86 at 08:55 AM on March 03, 2005
Still think the best 'name' I've ever seen on a jersey was 'WANNABE'.
posted by tieguy at 10:30 AM on March 03, 2005
This is a good place to ask this question: The JC Penney in St. Augustine has an entire rack of Ricky Williams Dolphins jerseys. What are the odds they will sell a single one, from today through the end of human history?
posted by rcade at 10:43 AM on March 03, 2005
An infinite number of stoned monkeys with an infinite number of credit cards will eventually buy a Ricky Williams jersey.
posted by tieguy at 11:24 AM on March 03, 2005
An infinite number of stoned monkeys with an infinite number of credit cards will eventually buy a Ricky Williams jersey. Because they are banned from getting the "420" jersey... I also find it interesting that 420 is on the list but LEGALIZEIT and CHRONIC or KRONIC are nowhere to be found. (at least I didn't see them there...) The one they should ban is "Houshmandzadeh" because its too damn long...
posted by chris2sy at 12:13 PM on March 03, 2005
i wonder how randall gay felt about his name being off limits. also, i am very disappointed that i can't get my official nfl jersey with the word TAMPON on the back, dammit.
posted by curlyelk at 01:58 PM on March 03, 2005
rcade, are you saying that if you asked my wife about our sexual habits, she would deny that particular act? One of the great all-time retail buyer f***-ups happened in St. Louis. When Gretzky arrived in town, Famous-Barr (a middle-to-higher end department store) bought an absolute TON of Blues jerseys and lettered them up with "GRETZKY" on the back. They came in right at the end of the season, and shortly thereafter, Gretzky took off for New York. Eventually the jerseys were priced at $19.99, at which point they were snapped up.
posted by wfrazerjr at 01:58 PM on March 03, 2005
I would totally wear a HOUSHMANDZADEH jersey. I really like the guy. Curious names on the banned list, on a quick scan: Carruth (and Rae Carruth; hmm) Deposit F Toyota Go Me He Hate Me (!) Hoser Mother Love Bone Any explanations?
posted by chicobangs at 05:35 PM on March 03, 2005
I see JOCK STRAPP and AMANDA HUGENKISS are not on the list. It's unpossible!
posted by worldcup2002 at 06:54 PM on March 03, 2005
also, i am very disappointed that i can't get my official nfl jersey with the word TAMPON on the back, dammit. Perfect.
posted by Samsonov14 at 10:20 PM on March 03, 2005
are you saying that if you asked my wife about our sexual habits, she would deny that particular act? Dear God, no.
posted by rcade at 11:05 PM on March 03, 2005
I love how they singled out Rae Carruth as a name you can't get on your jersey. Oh, him and Mary Jane. Guess they had a lot in common I didn't know about.