February 27, 2003

"As of this writing, 15 men in the history of organized baseball have ever thrown a perfect game. Only one of those men did it half-drunk, with bloodshot eyes, monster breath and a raging, skull-rattling hangover. That would be me." -- David Wells

posted by rcade to baseball at 11:08 AM - 16 comments

Brilliant. I've loved David Wells since he wore Babe Ruth's cap in a game. He's a throwback. As in, he likes to throw them back.

posted by vito90 at 12:05 PM on February 27, 2003

You mean Koufax was sober when he pitched that game? That's not what I read in the NY Post.

posted by kloeprich at 01:00 PM on February 27, 2003

How the hell does he know who was sober and who was not? In fact, if that fat Rasputin clone really cared about Yankees history, wouldn't he know that Don Larsen has made similar claims about his performance? Maybe The Boss should require it.

posted by yerfatma at 03:17 PM on February 27, 2003

tom browning was stoned

posted by mick at 09:25 PM on February 27, 2003

I do my best work drunk, and I got a 1250 on my SATs still buzzing from the night before, I say so what to Mr. Wells.

posted by jbou at 09:40 PM on February 27, 2003

I been known to take a little hit or three on a spliff before taking the field. Helps me get into the minds of the batters.

posted by vito90 at 09:43 PM on February 27, 2003

David Wells is a fat fucking slob who doesn't know when to keep his mouth shut. How juvenile do you have to be to think telling people you were drunk when you were perfect makes you a bigger man? Maybe the bastard should be drunk ALL the time, because he sure is a lot less dependable sober.

posted by wfrazerjr at 11:01 PM on February 27, 2003

I'm drunk right now. You want a piece, Wells?

posted by kirkaracha at 11:50 PM on February 27, 2003

Maybe he was drunk when he wrote the book. I don't see why people are taking this seriously. Babe Ruth is a legend for his life of excess, and Wells' reputation as a barfly is near legendary already. Baseball can use a few more players who are willing to sacrifice their liver to make the game more colorful.

posted by rcade at 07:37 AM on February 28, 2003

Mr. Wells certainly justified his place as baseball's greatest novelty player.

posted by therev at 01:10 PM on February 28, 2003

10 comments in and no one mentions Dock Ellis? For shame!

posted by 86 at 02:04 PM on February 28, 2003

ahh 86, we woulda but it was in the original article! ;)

posted by vito90 at 02:30 PM on February 28, 2003

oh and the rev...no way, that award has been retired in honor of Eddie Gaedel

posted by vito90 at 02:32 PM on February 28, 2003

And shame on me for breaking the first rule of SportsFilter. Read the damn article, 86! I'll drink myself into a stupor tonight as punishment.

posted by 86 at 02:33 PM on February 28, 2003

Vito, St. Louisans everywhere are thrilled you mentioned Eddie's name. That might be the single greatest weird moment in baseball history. I appreciate colorful guys, but he's a self-serving jackass. It's certainly David's right to say whatever he wishes about himself and his performance. It's also everyone else's right to call him out for being an immature weiner and think less of him as a man.

posted by wfrazerjr at 04:18 PM on February 28, 2003

It was all taken out of context. Of course.

posted by yerfatma at 12:19 PM on March 02, 2003

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