04/20/24
March 27, 2012
Why You Should Always Use Protection: New Zealand cricket batsman Kane Williamson suffered a broken box during a match today against South Africa when a throw by an unapologetic Dale Steyn hit him "flush in the groin region." "You do want your box to break rather like the front of a racing car," said the announcer. "If it smashes up then it disperses the energy."
I love the commentary.
"It's okay when the box cracks, as long as you don't get a little bit of skin caught."
"Awww... pinching! God, Simon, don't even bring that sort of thing up."
posted by holden at 12:31 PM on March 27, 2012
Lastly, I thought "box" referred to a different gender's anatomy.
Well, you're right - at least, it once did. As referenced by the old adult party song "She ain't much good at wrestling, but you ought to see..."
When you say "different gender" rather than "other gender", it suggests that the world may be a more diverse place than I realize.
As with US political parties, I am intrigued by the notion of a third option.
"You do want your box to break rather like the front of a racing car,"
The classic vision of tall Swedish women in white lab coats with black rimmed glasses and pointers talking about the Volvo's superior crumple zone has taken on a whole new significance.
posted by beaverboard at 01:25 PM on March 27, 2012
The classic vision of tall Swedish women in white lab coats with black rimmed glasses and pointers talking about the Volvo's superior crumple zone has taken on a whole new significance.
Having taken a foul ball to the groin, I can definitely attest to why it could also be called a "crumple zone".
I folded faster than Superman on laundry day.
posted by grum@work at 02:22 PM on March 27, 2012
re: Mr. Bismark's youtube link.
"Can you take the pain away and leave the swelling."
I'm dying here. Hilarious.
posted by Joey Michaels at 04:21 PM on March 27, 2012
Just in case you like Bumble's stories, here's another one, with less... crumple.
posted by Mr Bismarck at 05:02 PM on March 27, 2012
He's hilarious. Thank you!
Its not just the stories, its the delivery. His delivery is fantastic.
posted by Joey Michaels at 06:55 PM on March 27, 2012
My brother-in-law sent this version of Lloyd's story a few years back. I like it better because of the aside about Australian beer restrictions.
posted by yerfatma at 07:49 PM on March 27, 2012
The footage associated with the beer restrictions brings back some memories. It was filmed outside the gates of the SCG leading onto the old Hill. The beer restrictions came in after the 74-75 Ashes series against the Poms. My family and I were there on the first day of the Sydney Test, and from memory the 54,000 inside the ground (counting men, women and children) managed to get through over 750,000 cans of beer.
/I was also a regular on the Hill as a schoolboy and university student through the late 70s and early 80s. It was a rapid education in what it took to become an Australian male in a particular period.
posted by owlhouse at 09:17 PM on March 27, 2012
Great thread. That dude is seriously hilarious.
posted by outonleave at 10:18 PM on March 27, 2012
The footage associated with the beer restrictions brings back some memories.
I don't really understand the restriction. What difference is the 25th beer going to make?
posted by yerfatma at 08:27 AM on March 28, 2012
What difference is the 25th beer going to make?
The limitation obviously has something to do with a potential overflow of the stadium plumbing system.
I was field umpire during a Babe Ruth league baseball game when the plate blue took a foul ball directly to the cup. You could hear the impact quite clearly, and there was a collective gasp, then silence, as people realized the situation. The plate umpire waited 3 or 4 seconds (for dramatic effect), then raised his hands in the dead ball signal and in his best falsetto voice said, "foul ball". Play was halted for several minutes until all regained composure and stopped laughing.
posted by Howard_T at 01:19 PM on March 28, 2012
What difference is the 25th beer going to make?
Nothing. That's the nature of arbitrary restrictions. However in Australia at least, beer is sold in "slabs" of 24 cans or stubbies.
By about 1979, however, the restrictions on taking your own beer into the SCG were more or less complete. The first day/night games led to some fairly violent behaviour, and they slapped a total ban on BYO alcohol. You could still, of course, buy only selected brands of beer over the bars inside (the worst tasting ones at inflated prices).
Some time in the early 1980s, after several decades of beer cans being used as a form of protest at police actions in the stadium, and as weapons for amusement during rain intervals, they eventually banned cans from being sold and beer was only served in plastic cups.
This led to the Beer Snake.
Which was also banned.
posted by owlhouse at 09:05 PM on March 28, 2012
I think in the code of manhood it states that any time someone hits that region that an apology is always in order. Ouch.
Lastly, I thought "box" referred to a different gender's anatomy.