04/18/24
April 01, 2011
Cal Ripken used steroids?:
While researching for an upcoming book about the life and times of American baseball hero Cal Ripken, the author (Lance Williams, previous co-author of "Game of Shadows") was forwarded medical records from a disgruntled former Orioles doctor. The information casts a dark shadow on Ripken's storybook career.
[more inside]
Say it ain't so Cal..
Sorry to say, no one should be surprised.
posted by BornIcon at 09:21 AM on April 01, 2011
Nice one, grum.
posted by rocketman at 10:04 AM on April 01, 2011
Needs more comments.
posted by tron7 at 11:07 AM on April 01, 2011
Chemically similar to steroids? Correct me if I am wrong, but wouldn't a steroid be a steroid and not chemically similar to a steroid?
posted by dfleming at 11:25 AM on April 01, 2011
You'd think so. Unfortunately, the article didn't say the name of the independent medical expert, so it's not like we can do any research and find out why he used that terminology. The only doctor mentioned by name is Dr. Lirpa Sloof.
A little research shows that the bad doctor's identically-named son played in the Yankees minor league system a few years ago, but his advancement was blocked by a free-agent acquisition that spring.
posted by grum@work at 11:40 AM on April 01, 2011
This is complete bullshit. I spent a summer as a clubhouse attendant in the mid-90s for the Orioles when my parents lived in Baltimore for a summer when my dad was doing some government contracting. I saw Brady Anderson naked -- all kinds of back acne, super shriveled testicles (my buddy and I used to call him "Mr. Peanut" behind his back and I once asked him where his monocle was -- to which the response was "What the f%^& are you talking about, college boy!?"), etc. You may recall he hit 50 homers that year. Anyway, I saw all types that year -- a Bobby Bonilla who you could tell was starting to let himself go (and who was, incidentally, huge, if you know what I mean), but was clearly not on the juice. Hell, I saw Davey Johnson naked, which ranks right up there with seeing your grandparents having sex. Anyway, the long and short of it is that (to put it bluntly) I saw Cal Ripken's back and nuts, and dude was not using.
posted by holden at 11:51 AM on April 01, 2011
Sounds as if that summer had quite an impact on you, holden. ;-)
posted by dyams at 11:57 AM on April 01, 2011
Hey, if you've spent time around a men's locker room, you've seen a lot of sausage and two veg, carrot and peas, whatever you want to call it. I am not ashamed. Hate to have to get all anatomical in refuting this bullshit from those SF hater journalists with a hard-on for Bonds and the purity of America's past-time and apparently nothing better to do than run the name of a great American sportsman through the mud, but you gotta do what you gotta do.
posted by holden at 12:08 PM on April 01, 2011
The problem with Lirpa Sloof: when unreality hits too close to home, people will take it too seriously.
posted by graymatters at 12:11 PM on April 01, 2011
Damn you and your April Fools grum!
You almost had me there.
posted by BornIcon at 12:15 PM on April 01, 2011
And graymatters, that's Dr. Lirpa Sloof. He's earned the respect, I think.
posted by grum@work at 12:21 PM on April 01, 2011
Well played, Grum.
posted by cjets at 12:23 PM on April 01, 2011
Ha. Totally fooled. Well-in.
posted by dfleming at 12:42 PM on April 01, 2011
Fuck you. Well done.
posted by phaedon at 12:44 PM on April 01, 2011
Awesome.
posted by DrJohnEvans at 01:24 PM on April 01, 2011
I was about ready to go off on the violation of the patient's right to privacy and blah blah. Stupid fucking april first.
posted by apoch at 01:36 PM on April 01, 2011
Worth it for holden's info. Pix or it never happened.
posted by yerfatma at 02:21 PM on April 01, 2011
Good 'un, grum. It's up there with the Swiss Spaghetti Harvest.
posted by Howard_T at 02:42 PM on April 01, 2011
Way to get holden to admit to checking out Brady Anderson's, Bobby Bonilla's, and Davey Johnson's junk. And I guess Cal Ripken's 2 bag as well.
April Fools. She is a cruel mistress.
I would like to get some attention to one of the Pacific NW's most endangered species, though.
posted by THX-1138 at 04:10 PM on April 01, 2011
Good thing I read the comments or I might have actually jumped from that bridge.
posted by scully at 05:12 PM on April 01, 2011
Not for a second. Not for one measly second did I fall for that.
For exactly 0.85 seconds though....
Also - Dr. Lirpa Sloof? I give the story an 8, but the name a 1.
posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 05:25 PM on April 01, 2011
Fooled me.
posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 08:06 PM on April 01, 2011
Gotta love a good April Fool's joke, and this was a good one.
holden, I don't think you're supposed to look at other guy's junk in the locker room.
posted by dviking at 09:07 PM on April 01, 2011
Also - Dr. Lirpa Sloof? I give the story an 8, but the name a 1.
A good April Fools joke needs to give the aware people a chance to figure it out on their own. I've always felt that reversing April Fools (into Lirpa Sloof) is just enough to crack it.
I also played with the idea of using Dr. Olaf Sipolay (April Fools Day), but thought that might be a bit too tough to crack.
posted by grum@work at 09:48 PM on April 01, 2011
I know it's an April Fool's thread and all, but Banhammer, please?
posted by yerfatma at 07:52 AM on April 02, 2011
Ok.... good joke... But seriously all of these damned juice monsters (Bonds, McGuire, Sosa) really need to be banned from the record books. Give the records back to the ones who earned them without having to use drugs!
Hell, the only performance enhancing substance Babe Ruth had was extra ketchup on his 6th inning hot dogs!
posted by dchrist669 at 12:43 PM on April 02, 2011
Way to get holden to admit to checking out Brady Anderson's, Bobby Bonilla's, and Davey Johnson's junk. And I guess Cal Ripken's 2 bag as well.
Unless and until you have professionally yet lovingly shaved the balls of your boyhood idol to help eliminate cup chafe, you have no basis to judge.
posted by holden at 08:07 PM on April 02, 2011
Yeah, it's the "lovingly" part I think we could do without.
posted by dyams at 09:22 PM on April 02, 2011
Yeah, it's the "lovingly" part I think we could do without.
Without the "lovingly," you're apt to wind up with a boyhood idol with a little hitch in his giddyup.
posted by tahoemoj at 11:00 AM on April 03, 2011
(The article is getting hammered by traffic, so it make take a few tries to load. Here are a couple of excerpts.)
"I was researching the story and wanted to do a chapter on [Ripken's] amazing durability. His chase of Lou Gehrig's consecutive games played streak is considered the catalyst for bringing back fans to baseball after the cancellation of the World Series in 1994. I figured interviewing Cal, his family, his teammates, and his former trainers and doctors would help me get a good idea about his training regimine and his dedication to the craft. That's where things got, well, interesting."
"I was contacted by a former doctor who was employed by the Baltimore Orioles baseball team between 1989 and 1998. It seems that he learned about losing his position with the team before actually being let go in the spring of 1998. For whatever reason, he made and kept copies of medical records of some of the players before actually being terminated from his position. One of those records was [Ripken's]. He faxed them over to me last month, and said that he was tired of "keeping the lie alive". He said that if I were to look deep, I'll "find all the signs of steroid use" I could want."
The author said he was originally skeptical of this information, but then had the chance to look at the documents first hand. He passed them on to an independent medical expert (after removing Ripken's name, to keep the story a secret). The expert confirmed that the drugs Ripken was taking were, in fact, chemically similar to steroids.
This revelation seems to jive with Jose Canseco's claim that there was already a Hall of Fame inductee that used steroids.
The doctor who illegally copied the medical record, Dr. Lirpa Sloof, is now being investigated by Maryland State Police and the F.B.I.