November 04, 2002

Who's hotter: Larry Bird or Rod Brind'amour? The answer, of course, is neither. But for my money the ugliest man in sports in my lifetime was Patrick Ewing.

posted by Samsonov14 to general at 07:33 PM - 18 comments

Two words: Mike Ricci.

posted by alex_reno at 08:29 PM on November 04, 2002

I'm going to say that Skeletor was the ugliest man in sports.

He also goes by the name of Otis Nixon
Of course, among active players, Randy Johnson would probably win hands down.
But just grabbing a bunch of players listed as "Ugliest" in Bill James New Historical Baseball Abstract, here are some others in baseball history: Ewell Blackwell, Don Mossi (Whoa Nelly! Those are some ears!), Bill Skowron and George Foster.

posted by grum@work at 08:56 PM on November 04, 2002

Alex Reno, here's some pics of Mike Ricci from Just kidding. That Don Mossi thing is going to hard to beat, though.

posted by Samsonov14 at 09:17 PM on November 04, 2002

Come on. You can't tell me that this guy isn't the uglist man in sports.

posted by Discman at 02:59 AM on November 05, 2002

How is anyone beating out Scotty Pippen? I'm not even linking a picture because I don't want to see him.

posted by yerfatma at 06:22 AM on November 05, 2002

I think Discman was trying to link to a picture of Bill Cowher. Discman: You have to link to pictures on the web, not your hard drive. That way everyone can see them.

posted by grum@work at 07:02 AM on November 05, 2002

Happy 1000th thread SpoFi! And for my money, they get no uglier than Vlade Divac. Patrick Ewing is up there. And Reggie Miller in a sick child kind of way.

posted by Ufez Jones at 09:54 AM on November 05, 2002

Ricci and Brind'amour need to duke it out for the title. This picture doesn't do him full justice, but the Other Brother Darryl Zane Smith was right there in his prime...

posted by Mookieproof at 10:02 AM on November 05, 2002

Oof-- good call on Zane "Aermican Gothic Mudflap" Smith. Are we giving Sam Cassell a special dispensation because he might be an alien? If anyone remembers those Reebok ads, he and his mom certainly win ugliest mother-son duo.

posted by yerfatma at 11:38 AM on November 05, 2002

I second the Mike Ricci...especially during the "homeless beard" days. My god.

posted by Succa at 11:42 AM on November 05, 2002

Another good call--because Sam Cassell = Enemy Mine.

posted by Mookieproof at 02:08 PM on November 05, 2002

Man, I think we all had the biggest brainfart. May I give you the Ugliest. Athlete. Ever.

posted by Ufez Jones at 11:22 PM on November 05, 2002

Ufez Jones wins. The contest is over. That man is just too damn ugly to be beat. I thought Mossi might win it, but big ears and ugly just can't beat damn ugly.

posted by grum@work at 11:27 PM on November 05, 2002

I also went looking for a Zane Smith foto, but only found that one and something from his university's hall of fame. Back about 1989-90 I was sports editor at my university and there was a picture of Zane Smith and another contemporary pitcher (who was it???) over the sports desk with the caption, "Are you a Hatfield or a McCoy?" If anyone knows Jim Barrero at the L.A. Times, I think he pasted up the picture. Smith looked like the worst kind of inbred hillbilly.

posted by KyotoNils at 04:32 AM on November 06, 2002

Happy 1000th thread SpoFi! Yeah, what a proud moment this must be for the founders, as their legion of intrepid keyboard athletes tackle the sports stories that slip through the cracks of mainstream media. A symbolic thread, to be sure...

posted by smithers at 10:38 AM on November 06, 2002

what a proud moment this must be for the founders Sorry. Forgot again: no fun on the Internet for hardcore, serious users. Take it to MetaTalk, huh?

posted by yerfatma at 11:01 AM on November 06, 2002

Rod Brind'amour is so sexy. Really.

posted by iconomy at 08:49 PM on November 06, 2002

I'm sure we've discussed Ugly Footballers before. Peter Beardsley and Iain Dowie deserve a special mention.

posted by salmacis at 05:15 AM on November 07, 2002

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