February 25, 2016

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle:

A place to discuss the sports stories that aren't making news, share links that aren't quite front-page material, and diagram plays on your hand. Remember to count to five Mississippi before commenting in anger.

posted by huddle to general at 06:00 AM - 4 comments

The kid in Afghanistan with the trash-bag Messi shirt now has the real thing.

posted by rcade at 11:09 AM on February 25, 2016

Dexter Fowler resigns with Cubs after initial announcements had him signing a deal with Baltimore.

[Dan Duquette and Dexter Fowler walk into the room full of reporters. They sit at a table with a contract and pen, and Fowler is wearing an Orioles jersey.]

Dan: I'm here to announce the Orioles signing Dexter Fowler. We're very glad to have him on the team. He'll be an integral part of our chase for the World Series, this year.

[Dan signs the bottom of the contract, slides the contract and pen over to Dexter.]

Dan: Go ahead, Dexter.

Dexter: [pauses] Let me just say one thing. I was proud to be a Cub, and that team sure looks good, but I have to look after my own interests...

[Dexter stands, and Dan looks confused.]

Dexter: However, I get to decide how MY life goes! And that means giving myself the best chance to be a world champion!

[starts to rise] What are you doing?!

Dexter: Screw you, Dan! [hits him with contract in face, bowling him over] I was never going to join your rinky-dinky organization! You're a fool to think that was every going to happen!

[From out of the crowd of press a few figures push through...it's Epstein, Hoyer, and the Schwarbird! The press start yelling in confusion.]

Dexter: That's right, C.U.B. for life! [rips off Orioles jersey to show Cubs jersey underneath]

[Hoyer hands Dexter a contract, which he signs.]

[All four Cubs now start laying the boots to the prone and confused Duquette]

posted by grum@work at 01:38 PM on February 25, 2016

Is this Fowler's heel turn?

posted by NoMich at 03:33 PM on February 25, 2016

posted by rcade at 04:06 PM on February 25, 2016

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