November 27, 2011

The Hoser's NFL Picks, 2011 Week 12: NFL picks that are gearing up for haiku week next week!

posted by wfrazerjr to football at 11:12 AM - 5 comments

Being busy sucks. Went 2-1 against the spread and straight up on Thanksgiving. See you for haiku next week!

Arizona (+2.5) at ST. LOUIS RAMS (40): This week at quarterback for the Cardinals -- Charlie Trippi! Rams 22, Cardinals 16.
Buffalo (+9) at NY JETS (42): We haven't seen a collapse like this since Oprah took off her Spanx. Jets 26, Bills 19.
Cleveland (+7) at CINCINNATI (37.5): Peyton Hillis may finally return today. Yaaay. Bengals 21, Browns 17.
Houston (-6) at JACKSONVILLE (37.5): We have to admit, we're really pulling for Matt Leinart to succeed here. Texans 23, Jaguars 16.
Carolina (+3) at INDIANAPOLIS (47.5): Ugh. Colts 24, Panthers 20.
Tampa Bay (+3) at TENNESSEE (43): We may never hear from Matt Hassleback again. Titans 24, Buccaneers 17.
Minnesota (+9.5) at ATLANTA (44): The Vikings without ADP is like "Two And A Half Men" without Charlie Sheen -- just not worth watching. Wait -- "Two And A Half Men" wasn't worth watching before. Falcons 30, Vikings 14.
Chicago (+3) at OAKLAND (41): Reading wayyyyy too much into the loss of Jay Cutler. Bears 24, Raiders 16.
Washington (+3) at SEATTLE (37.5): We'd bet there's a discussion of some book on Iranian pottery on Book TV right now. Go find it -- it'll be much more entertaining than this game. Seahawks 20, Racists 13.
New England (-3) at PHILADELPHIA (50.5): Do the Eagles actually have anyone healthy to dress for this game? Patriots 30, Eagles 20.
Denver (+5.5) at SAN DIEGO (42): Philip Rivers has six kids under the age of 10? Well, at least we know one thing he throws that doesn't get intercepted. Chargers 26, Broncos 23.
Pittsburgh (+10.5) at KANSAS CITY (40): The worst thing that could happen to the Steelers here is it's wet and Troy Polamalu's hair gets frizzy. Steelers 27, Chiefs 17.
New York Giants (+7) at NEW ORLEANS (50.5): And now begins the annual and inevitable slow decline of the Giants. Saints 31, Giants 22.

Lock of the Week: Chicago
Trifecta: Chicago, New England, Tennessee

posted by wfrazerjr at 11:13 AM on November 27, 2011

OK, burning with curiosity, I watched the Denver game today becuase of the hype about Tebow. As near as I could tell from watching, they won the game in spite of him, not because of him. Now, I admit, I'm not always the most savvy of fans, so I could be missing something, but it strikes me that Denver has learned to win without a quarterback - but that they could be really great with a decent quarterback.

Of course, I suppose one could argue that Denver is winning games because God is on their side now, but that would be ascribing incredibly petty motives to God.

posted by Joey Michaels at 09:57 PM on November 27, 2011

Tebow's mere presence makes the whole team better or something like that.

posted by bperk at 10:48 PM on November 27, 2011

Tebow contributed 210 yards of offense. His 9-of-18 passing for 143 yards would have been better without 3 or 4 ridiculous drops -- though he was helped by a couple great catches. It was an adequate performance for what he was asked to do -- run a college option offense -- and he led the team to another win when Philip Rivers couldn't do it on the other sideline.

posted by rcade at 09:09 AM on November 28, 2011

Sayeth TheTweetOfGod:

"Tebow need not be accurate. Tebow need not be strong-armed. Tebow need not be anything. For Tebow is My nephew."

posted by billsaysthis at 04:06 PM on November 28, 2011

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