04/25/24
December 27, 2009
Ohio State Benchwarmer Blogs Way to Fame: Despite a career high of three points, Ohio State benchwarmer Mark Titus has become the most popular player on the team and a fan favorite during road games, thanks to his blog Life from the End of the Bench at clubtrillion.blogspot.com. A trillion in basketball slang is a player with a box score that has minutes played followed by nothing but 12 zeroes in the other categories. "People have actually booed him for getting a rebound and ruining his potential trillion," the New York Times reports. A snippet from a Titus blog entry explaining why four trillion is fantastic but five trillion is sad: "The reason a five trillion is actually worse than a four trillion is because there has to be a point in which the player is no longer playing the role of benchwarmer soaking up the scrub time, but is instead playing the role of 'guy who could make his way into the rotation if he didn’t choose to do absolutely nothing with his opportunity'," he writes. "As far as why four minutes is the designated scrub time, it's pretty simple -- the last media timeout takes place at the four minute mark. ... The last media timeout is the last guaranteed time in which teams will huddle around each other and discuss strategy, which is why it signifies the start of scrub time. Coaches don’t want to have to talk over the offense and defense with scrubs (or look us in the eye for that matter), so they wait until the last media timeout to sub us in, and expect us to run out the clock."
posted by rcade to basketball at 11:29 AM - 3 comments
Our first victory came against the Presbyterian Blue Hose and even though they might have the single greatest team nickname in sports today, I think everyone can agree that their nickname would be much cooler if "hose" was spelled differently. Maybe it's just me, but the thought of a prostitution ring being the backbone of the Smurf Village economy is much more interesting than some blue tube your grandmother uses in her garden to water her geraniums. Tell me you wouldn't have found The Smurfs more interesting if the secondary plot featured Papa Smurf pimping out Smurfette to the entire village. Hint: You can't.
I really hope someone gives this guy a paying job to do this when he's out of college.
posted by grum@work at 01:09 PM on December 27, 2009
I got a shoutout last month for longest losing streak in Streak for the Cash! Unfortunately, my awesomeness has come to an end. With regard to the blog itself, go back and read some of the ones from last season, especially the roller derby, the elevator story, and the letter to David Stern. Good stuff.
posted by bender at 07:50 AM on December 28, 2009
Delaware State had no white guys on their team, but they decided to play at an incredibly slow pace which seems pretty counterintuitive to me. The game turned out to be rather boring because of this slow-paced brand of basketball. In fact, most of the people I talked to said they changed the channel to PBS to watch Antiques Roadshow because they were so bored. I'm not an expert on how the human brain reacts to boredom, but I think it's safe to say that anybody who voluntarily watches Antiques Roadshow is practically bored to insanity. (I'm just kidding, Grandma! I'm not suggesting that you lead a boring life. Ok, so maybe I am, but I still love you and any food you might want to send my way.)
Heh.