Sledging: The Best Insults in Cricket: With the Ashes almost upon us, The Independent reviews some of the best efforts at 'mental disintegration' used on the cricket field.
I'm disappointed the Eddo Brandes one has been neutered with polite speak to tone it down from the original, but the Jimmy Ormond one to Mark Waugh was nice.
posted by Mr Bismarck at 07:26 AM on July 07, 2009
I want to be able to break wind lavishly.
posted by holden at 10:06 AM on July 07, 2009
Hilarious, but just too nice!! Could be much cruder. I liked the one about why he was so fat. Tormentor's wife gave him a biscuit every time they made love.
posted by jstron at 03:32 PM on July 07, 2009
Read the first ten. First one was funny.
I wish you all the luck Holden! Remember, practice makes perfect... and, I want to present this suggestion demurely, there is a soap named "Lava"...
posted by bobfoot at 12:50 AM on July 08, 2009
However the list doesn't include my favourite:
The rather portly Arjuna Ranatunga was batting for Sri Lanka against Australia, and during the final stages of the innings, asked the Australian captain, Steve Waugh, if he could have a runner. Before the answer came, the Australian wicketkeeper Ian Healy chimed in with "You get a runner because you're injured, not because you're a fat cunt."
PS: Don't forget the Ashes pointscore contest in the Locker Room closes on Wednesday.
posted by owlhouse at 02:50 AM on July 07, 2009